r/AskReddit 5d ago

You can have 5000 of anything that starts with Y. What do you choose?

10.1k Upvotes

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22.4k

u/Humble-Ad-7170 5d ago edited 4d ago

Yesterdays. I wish I can get back 5,000 days of my life

Edit: Holy shit!! This comment went crazy!!! Thank you guys for all the positive responses. And to the people who berated and hated. I hope you find peace lol jeez

12.2k

u/Addendum709 5d ago

Fun fact: 5000 days ago will take you back to October 17, 2010

7.1k

u/BaronsDad 5d ago

Nvidia, Tesla, Broadcom, Netflix, Dominos, United Rentals, bitcoin...

MegaMillions Tuesday, March 27, 2012: 9 19 34 44 51 (24)

2.8k

u/no-signal 4d ago

Bitcoin was 10 cent. Buy $2000 worth and start dumping slowly every year. You will have way more than 100m in 2024.

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u/imllikesaelp 4d ago

I remember when I figured out how to buy one online, but then realized it was over $100 and didn’t want to waste that much money in case it vanished.

515

u/eatmygonks 4d ago

Yup, still hurts

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u/TheGreatZarquon 4d ago

I spent 111 BTC on a large pepperoni and sausage pizza and a 20oz Mountain Dew at a local pizza joint back when BTC was just getting off the ground as a usable currency. That pizza at today's exchange rate would have cost $6,816,110.40.

I think about that pizza a lot.

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u/snuffslut 4d ago

Dude. I also bought a pizza with Bitcoin. I dont remember how many I used but it was when BTC was worth nothing. I also think about that pizza a lot.

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u/kaisadilla_ 4d ago

BTC has never been usable as a currency, much less in 2012. There's a story of a guy who "bought" a pizza for 5000 BTC, but even then he actually just paid some guy 5000 BTC to buy a pizza with real dollars for him.

I sincerely doubt your comment.

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u/Cantremembermyoldnam 4d ago

1) Lots of places take BTC as payment, even more than back in 2017-2018 when it took off. It's entirely reasonable that a "local pizza joint" would experiment with this stuff.

2) It was 10.000 BTC and the guy wanted to prove that you can get physical goods in exchange for BTC. Which he got.

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u/TheGreatZarquon 4d ago

The guy that owned that pizza joint was super into computers and started accepting BTC after it started to gain a little traction as a currency. I still keep in touch with the guy on Twitter and he's a massive cryptobro now.

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u/ADIDAS247 4d ago

What are you talking about? People were buying Lamborghinis and other high end items using bitcoin as early as 2013 and making the news all the time. Dealerships, Rental firms, real estate and a whole bunch of other fields were very quick to start accepting bitcoin coin.

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u/SleepTrades 4d ago

Don’t dwell on it lol. Some of us weren’t even born yet to trade it 😭 or too younger

100

u/oldentimer 4d ago

Oh great so now I'm dumb AND old

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u/SleepTrades 4d ago

Ur username checks out 🤣 it’s ok tho ur lucky to be old, nowadays some of us youngsters don’t even live to see that happen :/ one can only wish to reach old age

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u/oldentimer 4d ago

Oh great so now I'm dumb AND old AND depressed for my children's future

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u/BelaKunn 4d ago

I was mining it and let the account I was mining with expire and lost all access to it back in 2013.

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u/Jealous-Ad-1926 4d ago

If it’s any consolation, I did the same but did buy it, and it vanished. Thanks mtgox!

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u/Godfreee 4d ago

Theyre giving em back next month. After 10 fricking years.

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u/floflo81 4d ago

If I understood correctly, they are giving back the amount of dollars they were worth back then, not actual bitcoins or even how much they would be worth now.

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u/garry4321 4d ago

Step 1: Buy decentralized currency that's main feature is that it is secure without the need for risky financial institutions that can go under, taking your currency with it.

Step 2: Centralize said currency in a risky financial institution that can go under taking your currency with it.

Step 3: ?????

Step 4: Profit?....

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u/Dirty-Soul 4d ago

Bitcoin was secretly founded by time travellers to finance their trips to the "unprecedented times".

Lotteries were the primary means of doing so prior to this.

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u/Xenuthorzha 4d ago

i had 9500 saved up, was looking to buy bitcoin but the site looked sketchy and i had to link my bank account to it so i noped out. I think it was less than 10$ at the time lol

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u/_BMS 4d ago

I remember when there were bots on Reddit that were straight up giving away Bitcoin as basically fancy upvotes people could give to each other since it was so worthless at the time. All you had to do was post a command under a comment for the bot to see.

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u/robophile-ta 4d ago

A little later, Redditors would tip you Bitcoin Cash, which was pretty worthless. I was given $5 worth and then proceeded to upload it to some obscure exchange I've long forgotten about. Oh well.

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u/no-signal 4d ago

If it’s any consolation, I bought Ethererum at $100 and at $200 sold it all because there’s no way I will make more than double my money

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u/Cantremembermyoldnam 4d ago

You doubled your investment. You did very well :)

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u/__cum_guzzler__ 4d ago

my college roommates tried to talk me into bitcoin in 2013 but my ass was too broke. I couldn't even muster 50 bucks because i needed that money for food.

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u/ihoptdk 4d ago

I have a tale of woe to tell you. I came across bitcoins as a newfangled toy. I started mining them and soon a had 8 bitcoins. But it was still a little effort for almost no return, so I stopped mining. Eventually, they creeped up a bit, then up a little higher to $12 a piece! Twelve bucks for these useless digits! But before I caught on, they crashed again. I was sure I missed out. They creeped up again, and when they hit $20, I pounced! I sold 7 coins for $20 each with a half a coin fee. These useless things that cost me cents, $140 profit for nothing!

And obviously you know where leads. I missed out on selling those coins for hundreds of thousands of dollars. I even lost the wallet that had that remaining half a coin left over. So don’t feel bad about not knowing they would peak at $73,000.

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u/Archophob 4d ago

the next time, it will crash again, all the way down to 100k.

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u/treetrunksbythesea 4d ago

I had 400 Bitcoin I bought at 7 cents. Sold them when they were like 2€... Never thought they would ever be higher than that

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u/Iggest 4d ago

Hey I don't know much about crypto or the stock market. Can you explain why dump slowly every year?

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u/no-signal 4d ago

Nothing related to crypto. I’m just suggesting it as a way to get money quickly. I just checked bitcoin history though, it didn’t exceed $1000 until 2017 so op would have probably held on to them for a long time

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u/RoadDoggFL 4d ago

It's not unique to crypto. Any asset is likely to lose value if the supply skyrockets, if suddenly everyone around the world tried to get rid of their US dollars, the US economy would be in crisis. The most unique part of crypto is that it would take much less activity to affect the price negatively, so slowly offloading would definitely be the best move.

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u/TomChai 4d ago

Dumping this large amount too quick crashes the market.

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u/nico87ca 4d ago

Don't even need to buy them. My laptop was able to mine Bitcoin in 2011

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u/Temporary_Ad_6922 4d ago

Gawd I wish I had listened to some friends to get some back when. Theyre bitcoin millionaires right now lol. Even 100 bucks then wouldve gotten me a ton of money these days. Still think its a bubbel though and shady sh*t

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u/Unremarkabledryerase 4d ago

9 year old me couldn't afford $2000 of anything. That would be a tough sell but I think I would have to get my parents in board with that one lmfao

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u/no-signal 4d ago

$10 would have got you 100 bitcoins. Each bitcoin is now worth 60k. That’s 6M.

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u/doomsdaymelody 4d ago

Assuming the general time stream's course isn't altered by actions you take, then sure.

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u/ihoptdk 4d ago

Assuming you get to keep your knowledge of the future.

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u/t234k 4d ago

Did same with ethereum at £99

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u/Linkinito 4d ago

Butterfly effect: you cause the Bitcoin to never soar in the first place.

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u/Accomplished-Cat3996 4d ago

There is something to the idea that it was harder to buy back then. Still, clearly it is worth the effort.

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u/Conscious-Aspect-332 5d ago

Apple, Monster, Tractor Supply much better!

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u/BaronsDad 5d ago

wasn't meant to be an exhaustive list... but yes... it's a quick path to being a billionaire with a MegaMillions win and spreading out your investments to stay under the radar

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u/NoLifeForeverAlone 5d ago

What if you're already living in someone else's yesterday and that's why they're a billionaire? And if you tried to go back too, you'd just have to fight each other, changing the course of history.

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u/Conscious-Aspect-332 4d ago

That's an interesting concept. Musk, Bezos, Gates are all time travelers? I think being all powerful corrupts eventually.

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u/NoLifeForeverAlone 4d ago edited 4d ago

Never go back in history to kill Hitler. If it could be done, it means you're just walking into certain death by trying because you lived that timeline and it was the one that played out in a world where time travel was possible meaning all time travellers failed the mission... OR it was the lesser of 2 evils because again, you lived that timeline and it was the one that played out in a world where time travel was possible and you changing that should make you fear the alternative timeline that time travellers chose not to choose.

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u/Vast-Sir-1949 4d ago

Viciously corner the renters market and create renters unions instead of management companies and positively bring about desperately needed changes.

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u/TeamRedundancyTeam 4d ago

Much better than bitcoin? There is almost no reason not to put all of the money into bitcoin if you're going to 2010. Basically nothing else would give you a bigger return by 2024. You would make a terrible time traveler.

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u/jrodr102 4d ago

Add in bitcoin and 👌

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u/ThaVolt 4d ago

9 19 34 44 51 (24)

Careful on your next flight!

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u/alexrepty 4d ago

And Leicester City

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u/BaronsDad 4d ago

While I like this idea, I wouldn't want to attract attention if others are also time traveling. It's why I would be mining bitcoin instead of buying, and why I would spread out my investments to avoid having a significant ownership stake that warrants public disclosure.

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u/Velvety_MuppetKing 4d ago

Nevermind that, I’d meet my ex-wife again and this time do everything in my power to treat her like the queen she is. I’d have a do over.

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u/3amigos9123 4d ago

GameStop

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u/garfieldcangetit 4d ago

Speak that name again and be banished

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u/hamorbacon 4d ago

Oh.. now I’m convinced

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u/SanityPlanet 4d ago

Saving this comment just in case. Wait, it won’t be written yet. I guess I should memorize it.

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u/bortmode 4d ago

As soon as you do anything different, though, presumably the future changes!

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u/Nollypasda 4d ago

What’s the number in parentheses for? Not a big lottery guy myself

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u/DevilzAdvocat 4d ago

I've always thought that going back to the past doesn't change the element of randomness, so we can't guarantee the same future outcome.

That makes memorizing lottery numbers useless since it's random, but big ideas or inevitable progress would likely still come to pass. That means you'd still be filthy rich from crypto, Netflix, Tesla, Nvidia, real estate, etc.

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u/Stewieman123 5d ago

Thank you- 2010 was the perfect year

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u/Entropic_Alloy 5d ago

Middle of college. Perfect opportunity to turn it all around...

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u/ObvsThrowaway5120 4d ago

I’d end up just doing what I did back then in college. Just sit around getting stoned and playing video games lol.

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u/nerevisigoth 4d ago

Yeah but you'd also buy a bunch of Bitcoin for like 3 cents and be set for life.

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u/terminatoreagle 4d ago

I wouldn't be able to buy bitcoin since I was 9 then.

Maybe if I could convince my parents to buy some...

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u/LastChans1 4d ago

Mom, Dad, really; it'll be the cheapest birthday gift by far. For my 10th birthday, just 10 dollars of Bitcoin.

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u/TiredRightNowALot 4d ago

Back then you sure could. Localbitcoin.com

All you’d have to do is grab some cash, set up a meeting and then show up to the location with cash, have that shady character off the internet take your money and hope that they sent it to your wallet.

Crypto was a wee bit different back then.

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u/Entropic_Alloy 4d ago

If I could back, it'd be early in my junior year. But I'd probably switch majors and actually buckle the fuck down instead of barely skirting by. I'd also do the obvious investments, because I'd need another year and I'd rather not put that burden on my parents. And I could help my sister more with her own college. Also, having 14 more years to get in shape and learn more skills in my prime would be so nice.

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u/SirHovaOfBrooklyn 4d ago

Man, i'm suddenly feeling nostalgic for my college years. 2010 still feels so fresh in my mind.

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u/Fragrant_Tangerine61 4d ago

Damn I was 10 😭

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u/rckid13 4d ago

It's kind of crazy to me that there are people well established in their careers right now who have never been of working age in a recession. Both the 2001 and 2008 recessions really messed with my career progression.

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u/ChriSaito 4d ago

I was 14. I think I’d be okay starting back from there with what I know today. It would be a struggle but less of one than I have today.

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u/boltzmannman 4d ago

If I could go back to being 10 with all I've learned now I would have done so much differently

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u/thecursedcoffee 4d ago

Part of me thinks I could go back and buy a fuck ton of bitcoin so I’d be set for life.

The other part of me knows I would never mentally survive secondary school and university all over again. I would most definitely eat a bullet over doing that again.

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u/Nova_Aetas 4d ago

I'd end up committing so much cybercrime I'd get Dotcom'd by the New Zealand government.

Seriously, our understanding of cybersecurity has increased drastically since 2010. I couldn't help myself.

Not to mention I'd be 16 on this date, perfect time to get up to internet shenanigans.

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u/BaconAndCats 5d ago

Abso-fuckin-lutely!

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u/SpottyNoonerism 5d ago

2020 was still 10 years away.

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u/vridgley 4d ago

Nvidia stock was $.35 a share, sign me the fuck up

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u/Snackasm 4d ago

2010 was great but for me 2007 was the perfect year

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u/Kitchen-Judge-9391 5d ago

It really was

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u/WhatsHisNameHuh 4d ago

Not really.... wife dying of tongue cancer.

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u/NoLifeForeverAlone 5d ago

Was that bitcoin mining years or bitcoin buying years?

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u/max_power1000 4d ago

probably both. If you wanted to have a little fun maybe mine some doge in 2012 and sell when it blew up as a meme coin.

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u/Ninja-Trix 4d ago

Pretty sure we peaked in 2003, and it was all downhill from 2014 onwards, but yeah; 2010 was a great year.

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u/beallothefool 4d ago

When I felt like I was king of the world

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u/jujumber 4d ago

2010 actually was an amazing year.

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u/Logical_Brain28 4d ago

Magical year for me as well. Same year I met my wife.

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u/Alternative_Key_1313 4d ago

It really was. It felt so innocent and hopeful compared to now.. Great music. Clothes.

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u/Dolphin_King21 4d ago

The golden age of YouTube.

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u/Brett_Hulls_Foot 4d ago

The metalcore scene was peaking and I was riding that wave hard.

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u/After_Respect_4401 4d ago

I was recovering from oef/oif at Walter Reed army medical center.

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u/External_Mix_3633 5d ago

This would bring me back to a time when I was with what I believe as a soul mate. He passed away in 2011. I still miss him to this day. I’m now a mother of two, still with their dad…yet I still miss the one I lost.

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u/ResponsibleArtist273 4d ago

I hope you live a long happy life with your kids’ dad anyway.

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u/wakeruncollapse 5d ago

…I gotta do more with the next 14 years.

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u/orosoros 4d ago

I've been in a pit of regret lately, all about things I couldn't have changed. There are so many things I can affect now but I'm not doing it. Fuck

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u/Tattycakes 4d ago

Wise words.

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u/Dog_Baseball 4d ago

Nope you just get yesterday 5000 times, as in June 24th 2024. Groundhog day style

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u/FreshPersimmon7946 5d ago

My dad was still alive then. I'd give anything to go back to that day, and talk to him every day until he passed in July 2011.

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u/crazydave33 4d ago

Man that was about 6 months before my uncle passed away from cancer. I still miss him. Fuck cancer.

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u/kingfofthepoors 4d ago

That would give me 10 years back with my grandparents and at least six or seven of those years where they were healthy yeah I would take that in a heartbeat

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u/piletorn 4d ago

I’d be 21 with the knowledge I have about myself from now and knowing I should invest in things like Bitcoin? I’ll fucking take it.

I’d also go find my best friend and tell her she’s hella gay so she can get a few years early start.

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u/HawkeyeDoc88 4d ago

That would honestly be perfect. The investments I would make, the personal decisions. I would have stayed in the military at least until I had my degree, not bought certain things, finished my degree far sooner and probably had a masters by now. So many mistakes, and so many easy solutions that I was too dumb to see at the time.

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u/Top_Alternative1351 5d ago

That’s a great place for me to start fixing my life again 😂 I’d be a freshman in high school.

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u/firesticks 4d ago

This is almost exactly when I contracted tuberculosis and I would still choose this.

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u/quixoticelixer_mama 4d ago

I'd get to start dating my husband all over again 😭

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u/TheSeaOfThySoul 4d ago

That'd make me 16 - time to start transitioning much earlier (& also point out all the homophobic kids that are gay).

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u/HumperMoe 4d ago

I'd take 5000 yesterday's without a second thought. That'd give me another 2 years 10 months and 27 days to spend with my older brother again.

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u/Nytherion 4d ago

back to when some friends of mine were still alive and i can try to help them avoid suicide? okay, "5,000 yesterdays" wins.

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u/Mysterious_Ad376 4d ago

I’ll take that. My kiddo was still in high school and that year was rough, but my mama was still alive and I’d love to see her again—it was the year she started college. 

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u/dah_pook 4d ago

10 more years with my mom, almost to the day.

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u/BombNight 4d ago

That was one of the most fun years of my entire life. Graduated high school, kissed my first girl, went to some awesome parties. Had ALL of my best friends. Would ditch class to smoke weed in the woods. Knew we all were going to college together the following year. Got older siblings to buy beer. Had a group of beautiful girls that went on beach trips with us. Man... that year... was... really good. Im now 31.

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u/__get__name 4d ago

TIL my partner and I have been together for nearly 5000 days

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u/TheOddball7 4d ago

That'll take me back to primary 2. Good enough for me to start my life over again

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u/Melo1023 4d ago

Just months after graduating high school and days before my 18th birthday…that’s kinda perfect NGL

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u/not_salad 5d ago

I was on my honeymoon. That would be a good day to go back to!

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u/foodrunner464 5d ago

Dammit. That's sophomore year all over again.

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u/noturmammy 5d ago

Perfect, I could dump that POS 8 years earlier and save myself and my kids a ton of grief!

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u/almighty_smiley 5d ago

Freshman year of college? Jfc sign me up.

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u/ShiningShootingStar 5d ago

Omg I’d love that. I’d relive some of the best days of my life & my dad would still be alive. I wouldn’t have trauma, pstd & depression yet

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u/phord 5d ago

Sobering fact: the average human lifetime is 4,000 weeks. What did you do this week?

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u/HairyChest69 5d ago

So buy Bitcoin

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u/ehehron_ 4d ago

This is perfect. My 20th birthday and 2 years before the crazy girlfriend that sold all my shit, kicked me out to be homeless and gave my cat away. I'll take it.

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u/pentaquine 4d ago

Yeah that won’t do, I need to go back more. 

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u/Brucecris 4d ago

Julian Assange and the Chicago Cubs have entered the chat.

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u/vsRushy 4d ago

Damn, time does really fly by… The older I get, the faster it goes.

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u/murdocjones 4d ago

Incidentally that’s just the right spot to turn around the two biggest tactical errors of my adult life- dropping out of college and moving in with my now-ex. I met him Oct. 16, 2010. I would also like 5000 yesterdays, please. I want to go back to October 17 and delete his number and give myself a good talking to.

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u/Jaxxs90 4d ago

I’d take it, only if I can keep the knowledge I know now

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u/Key_Piccolo_2187 4d ago

That would give me a chance to fix me. I'd probably take it.

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u/tcmisfit 4d ago

Yes please. I’d marry that girl and instead of doing my adventures solo, I’d have a partner.

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u/the-day-before-last 4d ago

Good... Bot?

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u/KetoEmmie 4d ago

Huh. My 21st birthday. Went to dinner at a fancy steak place in downtown Chicago. My great aunt was still alive. She got pork chops, which I only remember because the waiter managed to drop a glass and it shattered all over her dinner. We were sitting next to some important football player (maybe the one that’s famous for going bald?) and he didn’t like us taking photos. My dad made the bar tender card me.

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u/lostinthesauce314 4d ago

That actually brings me 2 days before the day I attribute to screwing up my entire life so I’ll take it

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u/Coded_Lyoko 4d ago

unironically would pick this, that was my 10th birthday and i was sick, never got to reschedule the party

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u/Royal-Bicycle-8147 4d ago

Damn. I have wasted my time. The exact perspective I needed to make myself move, today.

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u/smegdawg 4d ago

Oooooo 28 days after I chopped my hand off. Damn...

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u/IPlayTeemoSupport 4d ago

Maybe i'll write more of the book i abandoned back then. Or more likely i'll just procrastinate again.

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u/Obvious_Peanut_8093 4d ago

bitcoin it is.

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u/Quick-Assistance-867 4d ago

Crazy I’d be 10 days old

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u/januaryemberr 4d ago

I would get to be with my family again.

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u/ill-be-lonely 5d ago

Idk I feel like if you told a genie that, you'd end up reliving the same day 5000 times

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u/apple_sandwiches 4d ago

Or you’d be 5,000 days older, and on March 4, 2038 you’ll have had 5,000 yesterdays.

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u/MizterPoopie 5d ago

That would be sick. Live the same day over for 13 years and then on the last day use all the collected knowledge to become a billionaire

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u/normie_sama 4d ago

Unfortunately, knowledge isn't enough to be a billionaire. That, and you'd probably come out the other end with some sort of crippling psychological problems.

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u/Sluggby 4d ago

I think it'd be more like living in reverse. Say I went back to yesterday right now, well that's not a yesterday anymore that's today, but the day before that was still two days ago. But let's assume for your next yesterday you'd go to that yesterday. So they'd go June 25th, 24th, 23rd, etc back 5000 days. Then what? Do they relive those days in the correct order again (10000 days total) or do they go back to the original today?

Or more simply it might just be a two day time loop scenario, seeing as whatever day you just lived is yesterday, you'd be bouncing between two days the whole time. I just can't see a scenario where theyd drop someone 5000 days in the past and say "yep, this is yesterday"

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u/kemitche 5d ago

Or you'd be 13.7 years old again (5000 yesterdays, no more, no less)

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u/m_dought_2 5d ago

Not ideal but better than nothing

At least you know it isn't unending.

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u/ill-be-lonely 5d ago

But do you get to keep your "future" memory? Does reliving "yesterday" rewrite everything so the "present" day never really happened? If it does... at the end of those 5000 days (which you have have no idea you relived 5000 times), you would probably just end up back at present day and make the same wish again, repeating the cycle indefinitely.

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u/meme-com-poop 4d ago

Or 5000 copies of the Beatles song

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u/Quazimojojojo 5d ago

Clever. If I can keep some memory or note of what to do, it would be an entirely different life.

But I'd have to go back to high school too though. Hmmm. That could be rough.

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u/RockitDanger 5d ago

Drop out. You'd have knowledge of the future. High School would be meaningless

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u/Numerous-Champion256 4d ago

In it for the social experience and simple pleasure of learning at that point. High school would be cake if I had the knowledge I have now. NVDA at $0.10 and knowing how to easily get in shape in a year, I'd be laughing my ass off every day

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u/Quazimojojojo 5d ago

You kinda need the degree to get any kind of work or higher education

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u/RockitDanger 5d ago

Lottery. Bitcoin. Stocks. Sports betting. Real estate

Why would you think a HS diploma is a bigger moneymaker than any of those?

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u/Quazimojojojo 5d ago edited 4d ago

I don't. The reason for a high school diploma isn't about money, once you're rich. When I'm financially taken care of I want to do other things with life than lounge around with my money, because you go crazy if you have nothing to do but entertain yourself. As Covid demonstrated. It gets boring shockingly fast when you never have to work again. Especially at age 18? That's 60 years of pure recreation. You'd need at least one passion project to stay sane, and that needs education to do well.

If you gave me a billion dollars right now, after taxes, I'd pivot careers, but I'd still work in some capacity. Maybe not full time, but I'd definitely be doing something to stay engaged.

Edit: let me put it this way. I don't want to use money to solve literally all of my problems. I don't want to flaunt my wealth. I don't want to buy my way out of earning things. I do not want the life and luxury of the ultra wealthy, and I don't want any kind of notoriety or fame. So even if I had that money, I would use it to make my life secure and healthy, not luxurious and easy.

I don't want workarounds for education, I want to learn shit and earn a degree and use it to do a job well, and not take that job home with me.

I want to pay off the debts of myself, my family and friends, and a few more besides. Buy a few luxuries like concert and festival tickets, pay for tutoring and personal trainers and expensive healthcare to help me get over my PTSD faster, and then have some stipend of a few grand a month to cover rent and buy literally whatever I want, which isn't much. Then, hire someone to use the rest to build micro grids in developing countries or some shit.

I'm genuinely humble in my material wants and needs. This is my plan. I didn't care if there's ways to use money to bypass some things. I won't use them.

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u/ChronoLink99 5d ago

I think you could do all this with self-study to learn all the knowledge you need. You don't necessarily need to participate in the formal education and structured curriculums of high school. I agree with you though. Need to stay busy.

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u/ResponsibleArtist273 4d ago

I don’t agree that it would get boring shockingly fast for everyone, but I do know what you mean. If I had infinite money, I’d love to jump around learning new languages.

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u/MrHazard1 4d ago

Work in a gasstation and dump 10 bucks into bitcoin and apple every month

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u/kidandresu 5d ago

You could buy 1000.000 bitcoin for 1000$

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u/Malaeveolent_Bunny 5d ago

If someone turned up with a time machine, put a gun to my head and told me I'm going back through my school years? I would tell them to empty the fucking clip.

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u/oozles 5d ago

Bitcoin though

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u/Malaeveolent_Bunny 5d ago

You're right.

"Reload and empty the second clip, do not let me rise as an undead abomination hungering for Bitcoin."

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u/Abraxas19 5d ago

Idk I'd like to think I could make high school a lot better for myself but that's probably wishful thinking. 

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u/DarthBanEvader42069 5d ago

the amount of bitcoin you would buy would change the market so much that it would never gain the popularity it did and you’d just have upteen million virtual coins.

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u/DasGoon 4d ago

1,000 bitcoin in January 2016 would cost you $435K. That's 0.0066% of the supply at the time. Hardly enough to alter the popularity. That would be worth $62,000,000 today.

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u/LawnKeeper1123 4d ago

I’d LOVE to go back to highschool!!

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u/tdslut 4d ago

Take part of the 5000 yesterdays and go back to a time you want to. Then save the rest to go back and fix anything else that gets messed up along the way.

Of course if it works like that, I want 5000 years. I’d go back to and keep my friend from dying in an accident, start making a note of obscure investments that pay off quickly, etc.
Then secretly be a sort of protector for all my loved ones.

Bob finds out he has cancer too late to do anything about it? Go back and figure out a way to get Bob to go get tested sooner. Jenny becomes paralyzed in a car crash? Go back and delay her just enough to avoid it.

Basically just enjoy life and create the best timeline I can in my little corner of the world.

Of course getting stupidly rich and living like royalty is always an option too.

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u/BrilliantCar1533 5d ago

I wish I can go back so bad.

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u/GarminTamzarian 5d ago

EVIL GENIE: "Here you go! 5000 copies of Capitol Records No. 5498 - "Yesterday" by The Beatles."

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u/Solid7outof10Memes 5d ago

Years is better. 5000 years, you invest a bit of money in stocks and as long as you don’t get accused of being a vampire it’s good. Also you can do everything you want in 5000 years, but also it’s not eternity so you won’t outlive the heat death

And best of all, you can finally achieve the years of experience required for your average entry level job before retirement age

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u/joseantara 5d ago

Thought about years after initially thinking of yesterdays also… and years would definitely backfire - you’d probably still age and essentially be nothing but a sentient pile of dust by the end of it.

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u/Solid7outof10Memes 4d ago

Haha that’s definitely a monkey paws way of interpreting that. Yesterdays could also be you stuck in a Groundhog Day time loop of yesterday tho, but fair point

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u/Optimistic_physics 5d ago

Everyone is talking about going back to 2010, but I imagine it as having 5,000 redo days, where I can slowly use them up over the years

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u/themindtaker 5d ago

All my troubles seemed so far away. 🎵

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u/loz_fanatic 5d ago

I think this would actually make it so you had 5000 yesterdays. Which could either make you almost 14 or add almost 14 years to your life

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u/AiiGu-1228 5d ago

This would be amazing!

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u/Eolu 5d ago

So here’s the scenarios I see: - I go back 5000 days with no memory of today, and just redo things. Nah. - I go back 5000 days but retain my current knowledge. More enticing but probably way harder than I can conceive so also probably nah (but tempting cause it’s a pretty cool option, and I could buy a bunch of bitcoin or something and be made for life) - I become 5000 days younger but just exist in my current situation, with all my knowledge and experiences intact. Hard to make sense of this, probably no because some weird paradoxes I can’t resolve right now. - I just stay my age for another 5000 days. Also tempting because it isn’t any major upheaval, but now I’m aging at a significantly different rate than my partner. Probably nah but I feel like if you caught me in the right mood I’d go for it. - I still age but just live 5000 days longer. Still a gamble if my last years suck but I’d be willing to take it.

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u/Totally_not_Zool 5d ago

Wouldn't getting 5,000 yesterdays just add 5,000 days to your past? Like, just age you a bunch?

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u/samzhawk 5d ago

5,000 days would put me back in my early 20s. I don’t have a ton of regrets but I would go back in a heartbeat.

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u/xavii117 5d ago

oh man, going back 13 years would be so awesome!

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u/TerminallyChill1994 5d ago

Damn, if that didn’t hit deep!

I would do many things over in my life.

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u/DreamOfAnAbsolution3 4d ago

This is the most clever answer I’ve seen in these answers. Sad but more valuable than money to a lot of people. This answer is for the hopeless. The answers about ways to get money are hopeful for the future.

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u/[deleted] 4d ago edited 4d ago

Granted.

You experience the first 5000 days of your life...and you remember every moment of it, including being up close and personal with your mom's pussy.

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u/garvisgarvis 4d ago

I would trade all my tomorrows for a single yesterday, holding Bobby's body next to mine.

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u/Schumacher242 4d ago

Hey i came here for laughs not existential dread … :(

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u/Mama-Bear419 4d ago

I met my husband January 2011… so I would love to go back 5,000 yesterdays and be at the almost moment where we meet and start dating. Ahhh such great memories to redo.

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u/SuicidalReincarnate 4d ago

Yesterday/s - the Beatles or Guns 'n' Roses? - both would have perpetual royalties

https://www.reddit.com/r/GunsNRoses/comments/11rn36z/yesterdays_by_guns_n_roses_vs_yesterday_by_the/

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u/Exact_Fox_7100 4d ago

Yo I was laughing my ass with all the responses. Then I get to yours and GOD DAMN. You beat them all!!

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