aitah for considerinf leaving my son in the county jail hospital over the weekend instead of paying $9,500.00 in bail?

[u/ShowerElectrical9342]

My son hit a pregnant woman with his vehicle and broke his nose and has stitches on his lip.

He was arrested and is in the county jail hospital. He wouldn't tell me how badly injured the woman is, except that she might lose the baby.

He's a careless, distracted driver who has totalled 2 cars, which his bio dad immediately replaced with even better cars!

But now his bio dad is gone (heart attack) and I don't want to enable this dangerous driving problem.

I'm overwhelmed.

He has had accidents before, and has always been bailed out.

I'm trying to get a regular lawyer because now he says she might lose the baby and sue him.

He's 19.

But no one wants me to take the time to get a regular lawyer instead of this public defender who insists I must send the bail money NOW or my son will be in jail all weekend.

Honestly, I don't know. Maybe that would be good for him. Like a wakeup call.

He didn't mention alcohol, but why else would he he arrested for a car accident?

Help! I have to move fast!

AITAH for even thinking about letting him spend a weekend in jail?

[u/Night_Angel27]

He's already totaled 2 cars. He's not a good driver. If he takes this as betrayal by mum instead of a lesson, she should hope he cuts her off.

[u/Dense_Reputation_420 → u/Night_Angel27]

I have a cousin that has rolled over 4 trucks in his life falling asleep at the wheel it doesn't mean you're a bad driver but that you're not responsible totally different

[u/pigandpom → u/Dense_Reputation_420]

Your cousin absolutely is a bad driver. Falling asleep behind the wheel is fuckinf reckless. If you're tired you don't drive.

[u/Dense_Reputation_420 → u/pigandpom]

Don't get me wrong I've learned from my own mistakes like my cousin but when you're 19 making over 80 a year your mind isn't right sometimes and you have to grow up and not just get left and locked up in county, different strokes for different folks if you get where I'm coming from

[u/AhabMustDie → u/Dense_Reputation_420]

I think getting locked up in county COULD be what he needs to grow up.

Unlike your cousin (I’m guessing), it sounds like OP’s kid has lived a very privileged life - his accidents didn’t come as a result of circumstances beyond his control, but of a lack of conscientiousness… that he desperately need to learn.

I think it’s commendable that you’re going against the grain to preach mercy, but a greater kindness than bailing him out would be to let him experience consequences finally, so that he doesn’t end up killing someone (else) or himself.

[u/Predictable-Past-912 → u/Dense_Reputation_420]

Don’t you get it? If “your mind isn’t right” then you are by definition, wrong!