r/AITAH • u/Few_Relative4595 • 7d ago

AITAH for ghosting my girlfriend after she nearly killed both of us?

So, my girlfriend (20f) and I (22m) have been together for a little over 10 months now. We haven't had any heated arguments or fights, except for the fact that she keeps tickling me randomly despite the fact that I've repeatedly told her to never do it again because I can act strangely to it (something from my childhood which I won't delve into).

Now to get to the current situation: this week I've had my car returned from a paint job and some major look changes and I was really satisfied with the results, so I took a day off from work and took my girlfriend on a short trip outside the city. We drove to a lake, ate some food and relaxed for a couple of hours until it got pretty dark and we decided to head back home to get some sleep as I had to go to work the next day and she had an exam. On the way home, I started talking about how happy I felt with how the paint job turned out and out of nowhere, she starts tickling me. I pushed her hand away and told her to stop, then she reached for my ribs with both hands and got me swerving off the road.

Thankfully, nobody was hurt (although my car got some deep scratches but that doesn't even matter anymore), as I already slowed down after her first attempt to tickle me. I'll admit that I told her "what the fuck is wrong with you" as soon as we stepped out of the car and she started crying, but I couldn't care less as I felt as if my veins were about to pop.
When we got home, I told her to pack her things and go to her best friend, but she threw a tantrum and begged me to forgive her for "a little mistake".

I didn't say a word, I simply stared in disgust and pointed to her luggage. After her friend picked her up, I tried to go to sleep but my mind was racing, so i barely got any rest. This happened on tuesday, and she's been blowing up my phone ever since, but I haven't answered any calls or texts and just blocked her. This led to her friend coming to my house and telling me to at least hear my girlfriend out, but I've told her to fuck off and leave me alone, which made her tell me that I'm more in love with a car than with my girlfriend.

So, AITAH in this situation? Should I talk to my girlfriend? I already feel like I can't trust her after what happened and that our relationship can't be fixed.

Update: https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/55iHa59YgW

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u/FinallydamnLDnat5 7d ago

I am a 42 F married. My kids are 11 and 9. I have taught them they can not argue and shout in the car to NOT DISTRACT THE DRIVER as all of our lives could be put at risk. The kicker for me was she did it a 2nd time after you told her to stop. OP you may have many girlfirends over the years, but you will only have one life. NTA my dude. Kick her ass to the curb.

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u/Recyclops1692 6d ago

Okay OP, you asked a different question from what you really meant so I have two things to say. You are NTA for wanting to break up with her over something like that. However, your question specifically asks about ghosting so I'd like to add, in any relationship, romantic or otherwise, good and open communication is key. So one thing that is good to learn early on in dating is that you need to be able to have hard conversations instead of just going no contact as soon as you get upset about something.

You dont need to consider any reconciliations or even explain yourself, but you do need to be able to say to someone, hey I am not happy or comfortable in this situation so I am breaking things off. Then you just move on with your life. That is for you, not for the other person. Being able to directly state your needs and boundaries is essential in any relationship.

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u/mutantraniE 6d ago

But he did. He told her to pack her shit and move out. That was the breakup. Not responding afterwards isn’t really ghosting, it’s simply not talking to an ex. It would have been ghosting if they lived apart, he said nothing at the time and then just started ignoring her. But she was living at his place and now isn’t. That’s pretty clear.

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u/Dieter_Knutsen 6d ago

Right? WTF is with these people acting like she has a right to his attention after they've broken up?