r/AITAH • u/Hour_Peace9278 • 4d ago

My stepmom took all of my horror stuff out of my room for her kid to be less scared

So I (15f) has this whole horror obsession, I’m crazy for it I don’t think it would be much of a surprise if I said Halloween is my favourite holiday..

My father (41m) has married my stepmother (38f) let’s call her Abby… now Abby has two sons and a daughter I’m not going to use their real names but give them fake ones.. Zack (16) Evan (18) and Katie (8)

I would like to start off by saying I don’t want to sound like a brat but for the longest time it’s only been me and my dad

So a few moths later Abby and her kids moved in and the boys had to share a room and for some time Katie had her own but my stepmom needed an office room so while I was visiting my grandma and grandpa Katie moved in my room that’s not the issue I don’t mind sharing but the issue I have is I ADORE anything horror so I have a lot of posters,merchandise I even have a Chucky doll, so when I come back from my grandparents my dad and Abby sat me down and said my room needed to change and be more kid friendly obviously I was pissed and stared complaining how it wasn’t fair

And Abby said her child should matter just as me, that’s when my blood was boiling.. so I yelled it was my room first if she didn’t like it she could sleep in the hallway or in the dog bed

My dad got mad and sent me to my room, I get up in the morning and get ready to go to school and when I came back boxes of my posters and funko pops were in boxes with a bunch of other things, only to see Abby talking them down… I get mad and yell at her that’s until my dad comes over and tries to calm me down and tells Abby she should stop but only for her to say ‘my child is scared of all this shit!’

I screamed for ages going back and forth with her until she threw a box and a glass object shattered.. so if she wants to brake my things I’ll brake her kids, I know this is going to abound petty but I grab her kids Barbie and ripped its head off and pulled the legs off and turned to her and say “brake anymore of my things and I smash your laptop up” My dad trying to deescalate the situation said to me go take five outside and from outside I hear my dad abs stepmom yelling at each other

Should I feel bad?

2.7k Upvotes
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u/SilentJoe1986 4d ago edited 4d ago

That office can become a bedroom for her child. They can make an "office" work in their bedroom if it's that needed. Is there no basement or attic? How often does she use her office for work? It amazes me that the sleeping arrangements were fine until you stayed at your grandparents house for a visit. What changed? I would push for her to buy a shed to turn into an office. It's what a lot of people do when there isn't enough space for one in the house.

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u/Hour_Peace9278 4d ago

Like once or twice a week she works from home on some occasions but she’s mainly in her work place

1.1k

u/SilentJoe1986 4d ago

Sounds like a home office is a luxury instead of a nessisity. She could probably get by just fine with a small desk in her bedroom and by closing the door when she decides to work from home.

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u/StructureKey2739 4d ago

I think she just wants to push OP out completely. Often happens with a new spouse. They want their partner to forget about their kids and focus solely on the stepfamily.

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u/-TheOutsid3r- 4d ago

Yep, she cares only about her own children and OP's dad seems to mostly care about getting laid.

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u/badDuckThrowPillow 4d ago

There's a reason "Cinderella" is a classic. They didn't make the idea of an evil stepmother/step siblings out of nothing.

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u/In_lieu_of_sobriquet 3d ago

Most of the stories with a wicked “step-mother” “step” was added by the Grimm brothers. The original it was the mother who was terrible.

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u/Raging_Raisin 4d ago

This is what my deadbeat dad did, and i went NC 15 years ago. I do miss the dad he was before he met the sequel (OP, call your stephmom the sequel, she will hate that) but not the spineless pos he is now. I hope you can have a talk with your dad because if they want you and katie to hate each other (too big age difference are forced to share a room) they are doing a great job. The sequel should put her home office in the bedroom or a shed in the garden, it is horrible that your dad allowed to just put your katie in your room and didn't tell you upfront. Please be petty and make your stephmoms life hard if your father doesn't grow a spine soon. If it was the other way around (you and your dad moving into her home) she would let you sleep on the sofa probably.

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u/ps2cv 3d ago

Be passive Aggressive. Though ppl hate when you're passive aggressive because they can't do shit about it

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u/AnxiousClue6609 4d ago

I agree with you. Plenty of step parents do this, and the real parent let's them. The OP is NTA, the dad is.

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u/sk1999sk 4d ago edited 4d ago

nta - if step mom Loved her daughter, she would give her daughter a room again instead of taking it over for an office. only working from home a few days if that, she can create space in her own bedroom for a workspace. your step mom wants you out. your dad needs to set this woman straight. you need your own room back & step mom needs to apologize to you and her daughter for being selfish

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u/newfor2023 4d ago

It was a luxury more than a necessity even 100% wfh. Kids need space. My daughter moved out. The boys got their own room each. I didn't take it even when it was free. I'm in the corner of the bedroom.

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u/AlmondMilkmann 4d ago

I work from home 100% and use my own bedroom as my office.

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u/RecognitionParty9581 4d ago

I wfh 5 days a week and my desk is set up in my room. Yes, it is tight work space, but still workable since it really is only choice if rest of family get to have their rooms and able to enjoy living room while I am working. Has worked well for over 8 years. Most families it is the Mom or Dad compromising for the kids benefit- step Mom obviously is making the rooms an issue to put Dad and Op against each other, and establish she comes first now, before OP. OP’s Dad needs to put SM in her place before he loses his daughter. He brought her into the home, he is responsible for her actions against his daughter!

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u/newfor2023 4d ago

Yeh exactly, also means I could roll out of bed to use it and have a good reason for multiple monitors, space to setup the NAS (tho a rasp pi is hardly large) but the drives are stable here. Built an L desk out of IKEA bits, have a 43 inch 4k monitor for work and 55 or watching TV in bed or just something to have on when working or as an extra screen if needed. Added a keyboard tray and risers for work/laptop monitor Its not a spacious area, beds in one corner but nearly touching the desk. Fits a decent reconditioned Herman miller chair though and more IKEA wall units mean it's floor to ceiling storage and wardrobes. Appears tight but works for us which is what matters. Lots of things like that probably look weird but we shaped the house around us.

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u/Realistic-Today-8920 2d ago

I do as well, and I switch between the dining room table and my bedroom. There is no one home 90% of the time I am working from home. I have the whole house to choose from.

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u/Totallyridiculous 3d ago

Or she can go to Panera like every other adult human (American, I suppose) who doesn’t have room for a home office but has WFH days.

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u/mouse_attack 4d ago

Your dad is an asshole.

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u/Foreign-Yesterday-89 4d ago

And spineless

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u/Interesting_Sock9142 4d ago

Ok that makes it even more fucked up that she "had to have an office" cause uh, no the fuck she doesn't. It's extremely unfair she's asking you to give up all of your favorite possessions for her daughter when she won't give up having an unnecessary home office for her daughter.

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u/ThornedRoseWrites 4d ago

That step-witch doesn’t need an office. It’s time to tell your dad to stop putting some horrible woman ahead of his own kid, just so he can get some action!

He is being a terrible father. You shouldn’t even be sharing a room with a kid half your age that isn’t even blood related! Step-witch’s brat can have the office room back, and step-witch can work her two days a week at the kitchen table!

If your father refuses to listen to you, tell him that you’re moving out to be with your grandparents instead, even if it’s just a threat. His reaction will tell you all you need to know. And if he acts like he doesn’t care, well… that would just prove that he cares more about getting his d*ck wet, than he cares about his own child.

NTA! But personally I’d have broken the step-witches laptop, because her daughter didn’t break your stuff, step-witch did. Plus, some Barbie dolls can be clicked back together.

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u/Talibanme-69 3d ago

Awesome comment but yeesh somewhere along the line you seem to have forgotten you are advising a mortified 15 year old 🤣

Did it cross your mind that cucks/useless parents with stepparent have many reasons and motivations for said cuckery? Pretty sad you deviated to sexual imagery of her father at first instance!

We don't know what is going on behind the scenes.

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u/CavyLover123 4d ago

Your dad is a fucking doormat and he’s being a shitty father.

Send him this thread.

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u/_Elephester 1d ago

Yes, please send him this thread.

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u/Aggleclack 4d ago

Holy crap. She’s a selfish person OP. That’s messed up. I WFH every day. My office is in my bedroom and we have a spare bedroom because it was important to my roommates to have that over an office. It wasn’t hard to consider their needs and we have all benefited from the peace and space.

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u/Electronic-Drink559 4d ago

She priorized a personal place instead of her daughter's needs? And she's blaming you because you're not colaborating?

NTA. I'm into horror too (mostly books and analog horror) and my parents knew it's important to me, they won't made a scandal unless I forgot my YT account open on the main TV. There's a huge difference between an accident and changing your whole private space because she's too proud of her office

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u/AlmondMilkmann 4d ago

That’s crazy. I work 100% remote and make solid money (6 figs). I use my bedroom also as my office. There is no reason why she should have a room dedicated for her own office when not all kids have their own bedrooms.

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u/_Elephester 1d ago

What do you do for work? I need your job 😭😂

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u/Lazy-Instruction-600 4d ago edited 4d ago

I have a hybrid work schedule like that. She does NOT need her own dedicated office space. We have an eat-in kitchen in our house, so I use the dining room as an office. As others have said, tons of people who wfh or have a hybrid schedule use their own bedrooms for office space. You don’t need much space to dock a laptop. You have an evil step monster on your hands trying to assert her authority. Your dad needs to step up and protect you. Teenagers should have their own rooms. End of discussion. No 15 year old should be sharing a room with an 8 year old, EVER. They don’t even allow that in foster care. I would suggest a calm but serious discussion with your dad, just the two of you, to express your concerns. Even show him this thread. He has some wool over his eyes right now because he’s in love with this woman, but he needs to remember this is your life too. Needless to say, NTA. Tempers flared and you did not strike first. You responded in kind. Personally, I can’t stand all that horror stuff, but I understand some people really love it. Parents are supposed to support their children’s interests. Not destroy one for the sake of another.

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u/Quick-Challenge6825 3d ago

Yep, hubby and I both have hybrid work arrangements.

He has a small computer desk in the bedroom, I have one in the dining room.

There's no way we would force our kids to share a room because of our work. It's our home first, work should impede that as little as possible.

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u/IvanNemoy 4d ago

She does NOT need her own dedicated office space.

Bingo. Unless they're in an exceptionally heavily regulated industry where you have regs like HIPAA or confidential legal files, things like that, an office is not necessary.

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u/Huge-Shallot5297 4d ago

What happened is that ABBY doesn't like the horror things and purposely put her daughter in with you to deprive you of your privacy, establish her dominance (surprised she hasn't pissed on your floor yet) and get rid of your stuff. If your dad allows this, he's not a good dad. Abby doesn't need an office; she needs to get out.

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u/buttleakMcgee 4d ago

She doesn't need it. My sister was a horror fan and I would sneak to read her old horror mags as a kid. NtA

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u/PrismInTheDark 4d ago

The horror stuff “issue” is probably at least as much the stepmom’s disapproval as the stepsister being bothered (if sis actually is bothered that’s probably her mom’s influence too).

Not saying horror isn’t scary obviously but liking it vs being uncomfortable is probably from the parent’s influence. At least that’s my limited experience.

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u/knowsitmaybenot 4d ago

you have a shit dad there is no reason for her to have an office. Best i can tell you is show him this reddit thread and how everyone is trashing him for being terrible making you deal with the step mom

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u/minecraftvillagersk 4d ago

That's bullshit. She only needs the space twice a week and she's going to force you to share your room full time. Your stepmother is extremely selfish. She can put a small desk in her bedroom or as someone else said, get a shed. If your property has the space, your dad can build an extension for an extra bedroom.

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u/angel9_writes 4d ago

Wow she is selfish... Her daughter should have her own room and you should have all your stuff.

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u/blueoasis32 4d ago

I am so sorry sweetie. Halloween is my favorite holiday too! This is YOUR house and your dad needs to stand up for you. Please call any family you can to help you through this. Hang in there - 18 comes sooner than they realize!

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u/Lady-Meows-a-Lot 4d ago

Holy shit what a beeetch

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u/BooksandStarsNerd 4d ago

Jesus. That's stupid. She doesn't need a home office. She should make her own room work.

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u/Puzzleheaded_Big3319 4d ago

tell your dad if he stays married to her you will leave and cut him off permanently as soon as you are able and he can have his entirled new family instead.

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u/BojackTrashMan 4d ago

Your dad is being so shitty and is a fucking pushover.

If I married somebody and had them move in, while we were going through the complicated mess of trying to blend a family that person's response was to throw a box of my child's things against a wall and break them I'd be filing for divorce. That's a bad bad fucking sign.

You are not the asshole and it's ridiculous that she thinks she needs an office for 2 days a week and you have to offend your whole life to share with a tiny kid. You're already having a really good attitude about sharing you just want your own stuff and to not have everything taken from you.

Yes you shouldn't have taken apart the Barbie that was messed up. Please remember the person who is doing all of this to you is your stepmother and not the child who's belongings you broke. But you're a kid and they are adults and they are being absolutely ridiculous towards you.. your dad should have stepped in the minute she broke your things because acting out in violence as an adult towards kids is NEVER acceptable. I can understand that you are a kid and you reacted to that sort of behavior with the same behavior. I do not blame you.

You are not the asshole and good luck for the next 3 years as you navigate these people.

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u/Beth21286 4d ago

What a selfish AH. This is entirely her problem. You need to have a serious talk with your dad about why he is letting her do this to you. Yelling after the fact is not defending you. Your stuff was already broken.

I am really getting tired of these parents who think their kids just have to put up with them destroying their lives because they want someone to sleep with. You are a parent first!

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u/donthugmeormugme 4d ago

Once or twice a week? Yeah she definitely doesn’t need an entire room dedicated to working. Did they ever consider that maybe you’re afraid of Barbie’s hollow smile?

For real, though. Don’t take it out on step sis anymore. I would say you should apologize to step sis for bringing her toys into it. But step mom needs to be dealt with. Wait until her and dad leave. Then take the liberty of decorating her mature office with the items she decided were too mature to be in her daughter’s room.

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u/biteme717 2d ago

Please update

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u/Patient_Space_7532 23h ago

Then her "office" can be a bedroom for her spoiled brat. I'm only saying spoiled brat because it wasn't an issue while you were sharing the room, but all the sudden when you left it because a problem. NTA. I hate when people touch, move or mess with what's mine.