AITAH for ghosting my girlfriend after she nearly killed both of us?

[u/Few_Relative4595]

So, my girlfriend (20f) and I (22m) have been together for a little over 10 months now. We haven't had any heated arguments or fights, except for the fact that she keeps tickling me randomly despite the fact that I've repeatedly told her to never do it again because I can act strangely to it (something from my childhood which I won't delve into).

Now to get to the current situation: this week I've had my car returned from a paint job and some major look changes and I was really satisfied with the results, so I took a day off from work and took my girlfriend on a short trip outside the city. We drove to a lake, ate some food and relaxed for a couple of hours until it got pretty dark and we decided to head back home to get some sleep as I had to go to work the next day and she had an exam. On the way home, I started talking about how happy I felt with how the paint job turned out and out of nowhere, she starts tickling me. I pushed her hand away and told her to stop, then she reached for my ribs with both hands and got me swerving off the road.

Thankfully, nobody was hurt (although my car got some deep scratches but that doesn't even matter anymore), as I already slowed down after her first attempt to tickle me. I'll admit that I told her "what the fuck is wrong with you" as soon as we stepped out of the car and she started crying, but I couldn't care less as I felt as if my veins were about to pop.
When we got home, I told her to pack her things and go to her best friend, but she threw a tantrum and begged me to forgive her for "a little mistake".

I didn't say a word, I simply stared in disgust and pointed to her luggage. After her friend picked her up, I tried to go to sleep but my mind was racing, so i barely got any rest. This happened on tuesday, and she's been blowing up my phone ever since, but I haven't answered any calls or texts and just blocked her. This led to her friend coming to my house and telling me to at least hear my girlfriend out, but I've told her to fuck off and leave me alone, which made her tell me that I'm more in love with a car than with my girlfriend.

So, AITAH in this situation? Should I talk to my girlfriend? I already feel like I can't trust her after what happened and that our relationship can't be fixed.

Update: https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/s/55iHa59YgW

[u/yourmomsgomjabbar]

I was curious, so I went looking and found this: https://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/court-driver-bikini-crash/2071993/

Looks like the civil case was from one of the survivors, multiple injuries but the only death was the guy who pulled the strings.

[u/viviolay → u/yourmomsgomjabbar]

That article is frustrating. “When her bikini top came off” You mean when she was SEXUALLY ASSAULTED WHILE DRIVING.

Apparently this is more common a thing than I realized given there was a post today of some dude doing that to a lady at a pool party. Yet some dudes will be like, “I don’t know how to act around women, I’m afraid of getting me too’d”.

Not removing their clothing without consent is a good start.

[u/KynarethNoBaka → u/viviolay]

For the longest time, and hopefully not anymore but I wouldn't be surprised if it was still the norm today, boys harassing girls from early puberty onwards has been treated as a way to indicate interest, rather than, y'know, the literal harassment that it is.

Boys need to learn to not harass girls.

And girls need to learn that just because the largest category of reported abusers are men, doesn't mean women can do no wrong. The woman in OP's story tried to kill them both while non-consensually touching him in a way he'd already repeatedly asked her not to, and then lied about it afterward.

Consent and safety are always two of the most important things to keep in mind whenever you're interacting with someone, no matter who you or they are.

These lessons need to be taught early and often, by a variety of sources. Schoolteachers, kids' shows, children's stories, etc. Can't rely on parents to teach this stuff. It has to be ubiquitous.

[u/harpajeff → u/KynarethNoBaka]

Come on now, be honest, she didn't try to kill them both at all. You just made that up. She did something juvenile, irresponsible and dumb. She NEVER tried to kill them both.

[u/Different-Leather359 → u/harpajeff]

Did something on purpose and it almost got them both killed. While death might not have been the intention, the fact that she deliberately put them at risk doesn't change.

[u/ObjectiveVolume8161 → u/Different-Leather359]

So, how is doing something irresponsible that could get them both killed the same as having an intent to get them both killed?

[u/Different-Leather359 → u/ObjectiveVolume8161]

If you push someone and they fall in traffic that's still a deliberate action, even if you don't think it through enough to raise what could happen. You will be tried for murder (or attempted murder if they survive) because it was a foreseeable consequence.

[u/Sunrunner_Princess → u/Different-Leather359]

Actually, depending on the circumstances, that’s what voluntary and non-voluntary manslaughter charges are for. Intentionally doing something they know is dangerous, even if the intent is not to harm or kill anyone, that results in death is basically manslaughter in the US. Of course, it always depends on the circumstances, the resources of the defendant, how thorough an investigation, and what the district attorney’s office decides to charge or plea down ( usually based on their willingness to risk losing/statistics of successful prosecution, not necessarily the right thing or “upholding the law”).

[u/ObjectiveVolume8161 → u/Different-Leather359]

It's irrelevant. We're talking about intent here.

So, if I push somebody and they randomly fall into traffic, the intent isn't to kill. Death occurs as a conclusion to events.

If I push somebody into traffic, hell, even then the intent might not be there.

Intent is defined as intention or purpose - a determination to do something. So, if my intention is to kill her, then and only then is there an attempt to kill you.

Legality of it is a whole different conversation.

[u/[deleted] → u/ObjectiveVolume8161]

[removed] — view removed comment

[u/ObjectiveVolume8161 → u/[deleted]]

What are you on about? Go take your meds, calm down and then we can talk if you have anything relevant to say.

[u/mutantraniE → u/ObjectiveVolume8161]

They did. You on the other hand have never said anything relevant.

[u/ObjectiveVolume8161 → u/mutantraniE]

Is that really all you've got? It's embarrassing to read such weak, pathetic insults; reflection of your personality, perhaps?

[u/mutantraniE → u/ObjectiveVolume8161]

It’s not an insult, just accurate information. Stop shitting up the thread with your nonsense.

[u/ObjectiveVolume8161 → u/mutantraniE]

The irony is staggering. What are you basing that information on?

[u/mutantraniE → u/ObjectiveVolume8161]

Observation of your behavior.