TIFU by Spilling Scalding Hot Coffee on My Privates During a Road Trip

[u/JackTheRipper2828]

This happened just a few hours ago and I'm still trying to recover from the embarrassment and pain. So, my Parents and I decided to take a road trip to my Grandmothers in Niagara Falls. So, We're cruising down the highway, And I'm in the backseat enjoying my Nice Hot Mcdonalds BLACK Coffee.

Now, let me set the scene, we're all Talking and joking around, having a great time. I reach down to grab my phone from the floor of the car, and in the process, my elbow somehow knocks my Cup right into my lap. The lid pops off, and scalding hot coffee spills all over my crotch.

Instantly, I go from laughing to screaming bloody murder. My Parents slam on the brakes, thinking we've hit something or that I'm having a medical emergency. I'm flailing around, trying to undo my seatbelt and trying not to make a bigger mess in the car.

Finally, they pull over, and I stumble out of the car, half in pain and half in embarrassment. I manage to peel off my jeans and boxers right there on the side of the road, while my Parents are alternating between concerned and trying not to laugh. Meanwhile, I'm desperately trying to cool down the burns with water from our cooler, feeling like the world's biggest idiot.

After what feels like an eternity of roadside humiliation, I manage to clean myself up as best as I can and get back into the car. Needless to say, the rest of the road trip was a lot quieter as I sat there nursing my wounded pride and even more wounded privates.

Lesson learned: always make sure your lid is securely fastened, especially when you're on a bumpy road trip.

TL;DR: Tried to enjoy coffee on a road trip, ended up with burns on my nether regions and a story I'll never live down with my Parents. I'm sticking to iced from now on

I couldn't stop myself from laughing writing this, I am literally wheezing both in Pain and How Funny the Whole Situation is

[u/Flybot76]

Wow, that sounds uncomfortable to say the least. You're lucky there was already an infamous lawsuit about McDonald's coffee a few decades ago or you might be getting skin grafts. A woman got a to-go cup so hot that the cup fell apart and she got severe burns all over her 'abdominal area' which required long-term medical attention. The lawsuit was joked about publicly but there are documentaries and articles making it clear, she wasn't in the wrong, they gave her coffee that was too hot for the cup itself. They made all franchisees lower the temp on their coffee after that and might have changed the cups.

[u/ItsBaconOclock → u/Flybot76]

Just to add a bit to this, because I think it can never be overstated.

Liebeck went into shock and was taken to an emergency room at a hospital. She suffered third degree burns on six percent of her skin and lesser burns over sixteen percent. She remained in the hospital for eight days while she underwent skin grafting. During this period, Liebeck lost 20 pounds (9.1 kg), nearly 20 percent of her body weight, reducing her to 83 pounds (38 kg). After the hospital stay, Liebeck needed care for three weeks, which was provided by her daughter. Liebeck suffered permanent disfigurement after the incident and was partially disabled for two years.

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Liebeck_v._McDonald%27s_Restaurants

[u/Flybot76 → u/ItsBaconOclock]

And at first she only wanted the money to pay for medical attention! It became a bigger deal because they fought it so hard and trashed her in the media.

[u/Henry5321 → u/Flybot76]

Yeah, she almost died

[u/PointsOutTheUsername → u/Flybot76]

I'm just glad OP didn't take the known-to-be-hot coffee, take off the lid, place it between their legs, then spill. 

Makes the situation a lot more sympathetic. 

[u/imacmadman22]

That’s gonna leave a mark…

My condolences, friend. No action for you on this road trip.

[u/JackTheRipper2828 → u/imacmadman22]

I know..... Thank you Comrade

[u/Snookaboom]

Reusable coffee mugs with good dependable lids, FTW.

[u/JackTheRipper2828 → u/Snookaboom]

YESSSS, I am doing that from now on, Granted it is summer and i like iced coffee so i should be drinking that more but Im canadian and it gets pretty cold up here in the winters. I am buying a yeti once fall hits, thanks

[u/Snookaboom → u/JackTheRipper2828]

Yeah, my cups not only prevent disposable use, but they keep my coffee or matcha colder longer if it’s iced, and hotter longer if it’s a hot drink. I use ones with stainless steel inside. Seems to work better & not plastic-y. Plus they’re larger so you get more.

[u/leon_gonfishun]

You're doing it wrong.

Sue McDonalds. Sue Tim Hortons. Sue Little Juan who roasta the cocoa beans.

[u/Poolman2024]

Bring you own cup!

[u/JackTheRipper2828 → u/Poolman2024]

Will do Haha, I bought a Stanley for all the hot coffees and I just the Cup at the Resturant for Iced Coffee's.

[u/rez0nantallis]

Glad you can find humor in it now despite the discomfort. Maybe next time opt for iced coffee to avoid any more spontaneous mishaps.

[u/JackTheRipper2828 → u/rez0nantallis]

Will do haha, Thanks

[u/HarlodsGazebo → u/rez0nantallis]

AI Bot 1

[u/sqrglamour]

Glad you managed to handle the situation, albeit with some embarrassment. Always a good reminder to double-check those coffee cup lids, especially on adventurous road trips!

[u/HarlodsGazebo → u/sqrglamour]

AI Bot 2

[u/Dontkillmejay → u/HarlodsGazebo]

100%

[u/JackTheRipper2828 → u/sqrglamour]

I will superglue the lids to the cup before we leave the parking lot ;)

Thanks for the advice :)