r/AITAH • u/HopefullyIntentional • 4d ago

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u/Primary-Molasses-259 4d ago

YTA. You are an adult. You don’t backhand a kid. Period.

Your sister in law has failed her son. Has she sought a diagnosis for him? Children do not just behave this way for no reason.

Our son has autism and prior to his diagnosis he was being bullied at school (not enough to leave visible marks, but pushed and shoved and verbally taunted). He was always the model child at school. When he would come home, he would lash out - kicking, hitting, punching, etc.

We did everything we could to get to the bottom of it. He finally told a therapist that he was being bullied at school and the therapist explained that he could only regulate his emotions for so long and when he got home to his safe zone where he knew he was loved no matter what, he unleashed his emotions and took out his anger and sadness and fears on people who would still love him no matter what.

But we had to constantly advocate for him and get to the bottom of what was going on and not just allow that type of behavior of “oh well, he hits and punches us.” That would have set him up for a lifetime of hurt and of failure and of never allowing him to get services he needed or allowing him to thrive.

I don’t know your nephew’s particular issues, but this is not normal and I hope his mom is not just “going with the flow” and thinking that her son is just n asshole. He needs help. There is a REASON a child his age acts this way and she needs to figure out what is it & get him the help he needs.