r/AskReddit 5d ago

You can have 5000 of anything that starts with Y. What do you choose?

10.1k Upvotes

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5.7k

u/BabyManBun 5d ago

Your moms

3.4k

u/pedantic_dullard 5d ago

The question was 5000 things you could have. Not what have 5000 people had.

663

u/thatoneguy2252 5d ago

You didn’t have to shoot the corpses head. Other guy already killed him.

282

u/Boojum2k 5d ago

Rule #2: Double Tap

121

u/zakkil 5d ago

We already know everyone tapped that twice.

4

u/lord_hijinks 4d ago

L M A O!

1

u/Msboredd 3d ago

AT LEAST

22

u/ElToroBlanco25 5d ago

Double tap? He unloaded the clip

7

u/SpottyNoonerism 5d ago

Can't forget cardio though

6

u/rockinvet02 4d ago

And cardio... Just ask that guys mom.

3

u/wabbitsdo 4d ago

It's been established OP's mom had been tapped a lot a more than that.

12

u/JoJackthewonderskunk 5d ago

You do if you want it too stay dead!

27

u/iK_550 5d ago

Do you know what War Crimes are?

11

u/pedantic_dullard 5d ago

His mom's wet spot?

2

u/La_Saxofonista 4d ago

War crimes, not wh*re crimes

60

u/GiantWhiteCohc 5d ago

F A T A L I T Y

3

u/ITrCool 5d ago

“Respect the game, Jim”

3

u/ultimate_sorrier 5d ago

FUCK YOU SHORESY!

2

u/PretendMuteTrain 5d ago

Someone said women are objects. Not me/s

2

u/zerolimits0 5d ago

Gat damn 🔥

1

u/Cutsdeep- 5d ago

now they can have one each and everybody is happy

-2

u/ShannieD 5d ago

5000 people had your mom?

340

u/jordan1978 5d ago

Yep, that’s it guys. Shut it down.

17

u/Uncle_itlog 5d ago

Yep. I’d be disappointed if I didn’t see this comment.

87

u/Zkenny13 5d ago

/thread

9

u/StoppedListeningToMe 5d ago

Yup we're all a hive mind and I'm super fucking unoriginal...

22

u/SomeDrillingImplied 5d ago

You’re really ready to disappoint 5,000 moms?

3

u/Appropriate_Suit1882 4d ago

Yeah but I’d have a really good 30 seconds first, 5,000 times.

4

u/BabyManBun 5d ago

Disappointment is a temporary detour on the road to giving you guys some new siblings

10

u/FishInTheTrees 5d ago

You would not believe your eyes

If 10,000 of your mom thighs

Crushed my head as you fell asleep

8

u/musclecard54 5d ago

5000 your moms?! Are you trying to create a black hole?

5

u/chr0n1c843 5d ago

Dammit I was gonna say that... lol

6

u/tobetossedout 5d ago

The plural form is yours mom.

2

u/kthanksbye_ 4d ago

I don't know why I found this absurdly hilarious

4

u/jidovski 4d ago

Great now you have 5001 moms disappointed in you

3

u/DescendantLila 5d ago

Damn it! I came here to say this lmao

4

u/bluemitersaw 5d ago

I was waiting for this one

4

u/HailToTheThief225 5d ago

First 5000 upvotes get to have OP’s mom!

5

u/icepyrox 5d ago

... and the planet just collapses into itself from the sudden lass increase.

2

u/That_One_Normie 5d ago

Sell them for profit

4

u/tummyache-champion 5d ago

EXACTLY the comment I was expecting to see at the top. Carry on.

1

u/[deleted] 5d ago

[deleted]

1

u/Normallydifferent 5d ago

5000? 1 is plenty large enough

1

u/Pumpkinbatteri 5d ago

I love your username!

1

u/downwiththewoke 5d ago

Little does he know what he's asking for 😂. God help you x

1

u/WildResident2816 5d ago

Pretty sure that would crush Texas

1

u/ChronoLink99 5d ago

Aw man, same.

1

u/AnticPosition 5d ago

This is what I came here for. Did not disappoint. 

1

u/neverinamillionyr 5d ago

How much would that weigh?

1

u/UrMom_BrushYourTeeth 4d ago

Thank you sweetie

1

u/JBluHevn 4d ago

My brain immediately answered this way.

1

u/blueCougFan 4d ago

I was looking for a yo mama joke. Found it.

1

u/SoundSproutHI 4d ago

Nooo I was gonna say this

1

u/The_Grinning_Reaper 4d ago

So, the universe collapses under their weight..

1

u/atheista 4d ago

I'm amazed I had to scroll this far. Reddit, you've changed.

1

u/PickledPhallus 4d ago

That much mass in a space as small as Earth would collapse it into a black hole and kill everyone

1

u/almeyras 4d ago

Yomomma so fat…

1

u/danziman123 4d ago

Finally! Scrolled down wayyyyy too much

1

u/HypersomnicHysteric 4d ago

Give me a showel and I bring her to you!

1

u/littlebittlebunny 4d ago

No, no, noooooo!!! That would be the worst thing you could possibly do. The world can't handle 1 of my mother's I couldnt imagine how plagued the world would be with 4999 more of them on the planet!!!

1

u/bflatmusic7 5d ago

I also pick this guys mom

1

u/mcbizkit02 5d ago

Hope you have a lot of space.

1

u/MrStealYoMom 5d ago

Can confirm

1

u/whattheduce86 5d ago

I was hoping this was the top answer.

0

u/Howdysf 5d ago

I also choose this guy’s mom.