r/oldpeoplefacebook • u/Kronikle Sederrrdddggff • 3d ago

My mom made a post asking for help picking out a name for her dog. I've assembled my favorite replies.

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1.6k Upvotes
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1.2k

u/littlelordgenius 3d ago edited 2d ago

I don’t have a dog sorry

635

u/sic_parvis_magna_ 3d ago

I love the need for old people to participate in everything they see even if they don't relate to any of it. They HAVE to put their 2 cents in

314

u/SehnorCardgage 2d ago

If you didn't want my I put, why did you post this on my feed?

225

u/Drannion 2d ago

I think they often think it was sent directly to them, so they are just trying to be polite and not keep you waiting. Similar to how a lot of Google Maps reviews have old people writing "I have never been there".

124

u/honkhonkbeepbeeep 2d ago

My silent generation mother doesn’t get no matter how many times people explain it that Facebook posts are shown to your whole friend list. She doesn’t use any of it, but she thinks it’s like email. I’ll say something like, yeah, I know my cousin has a new grandkid because he posted on Facebook, and she is baffled (“I had no idea you talk to him”). No, I really don’t, we don’t really interact, but I have basically anyone I know and don’t actively hate friended and I see their major life updates. She’s convinced though that my cousin has to have emailed me personally.

47

u/breadist 2d ago

My mom demanded that her Facebook account be deleted because it was too much and she couldn't keep up with it. She felt like everything that she was shown was directed at her and demanded her attention. So she felt like she had to delete it to avoid it instead of just, you know, ignoring it or using it less if it's too much, like a normal person. Lol.

52

u/PansexualTree 2d ago

Honestly, go her. Mental health queen, just delete if it's too overwhelming

32

u/breadist 2d ago

Oh yeah for sure but the thing is she thought her feed was basically like email where someone had to intentionally include her and target her, so she felt compelled to check it so she wouldn't keep them waiting for her reply. That's what she found overwhelming - she thought basically people were trying to talk to her at all hours of the day. Like if she went through enough Facebook posts eventually she'd get to the end and she'd be "done" and there'd be no more Facebook for now. But that doesn't happen so she was overwhelmed trying to get through it "all".

I tried to explain to her that it isn't people trying to talk to her, they're just posting on their feed and it's okay to not see everything. You don't have to read everything and there is no "end". But she could not understand the concept. She had to delete it.

11

u/Iewoee 2d ago

Aawwh this poor sweet lady! I can imagine how overwhelmed she must've been!

10

u/breadist 2d ago

If you knew her you wouldn't call her sweet lol. But yeah this is pretty innocent.

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7

u/IAMACat_askmenothing 2d ago

My mom tells me stuff my mil posts because I don’t have facebook as if my wife doesnt tell me the important stuff

3

u/MarlenaEvans 5h ago

My mom does this to me too. She keeps telling me about my sister in law 's surgery and I'm like, yes I saw the same post on Facebook, Mom. Then she gets on her computer and reads them to me while we're on the phone and I'll say, I know, we are also friends and I saw that. She thinks she's privy to secret special information, I guess I should feel privileged she's sharing with me.

58

u/Caa3098 2d ago

Same as the Amazon “answers.” Most customer questions on there have dozens of responses that say things like “I didn’t need to use it that way so I don’t know” or “I bought this for my grandson so I don’t know how long that piece is”

9

u/handsbricks DONT WANT TO AFEND 2d ago

/r/amazonanswers

18

u/katie-kaboom 2d ago

Literally something I've heard from my mother.

15

u/IhearClemFandango 2d ago

I've seen so many amazon questions/answers where they respond with a simple I don't know.

8

u/PurpleAntifreeze 2d ago

They will actually email you and ask a question about products you’ve bought though. This one’s understandable.

13

u/noapparentfunction 2d ago

alternatively, the kinder part of them thinks that a live person on Amazon is emailing them & needs their help before buying a product. they're waiting for grandma's response and she has to get back right away. same with Google Maps. Joe Google urgently wants to know if you've been to this coffee shop!

5

u/rangda 2d ago

I like when they get promoted to review an Amazon item they bought as a gift and get mad about the prompt, so they give the item one star because “HOW WOULD I KNOW?”

6

u/viralslapzz 2d ago

Amen 🙏

0

u/geofox777 2d ago

That’s not old people, that’s everyone

13

u/SourCreamWater 3d ago

Name the dog "Bunny".

11

u/mldl 2d ago

Dog.

2

u/taylortherebel 1d ago

This cracked me up for some reason

8

u/owzleee 2d ago

I do but he’s called Kevin I don’t feel qualified to be on this thread.

292

u/TatoIndy 3d ago

I also vote for Michael

29

u/dirtychinchilla 2d ago

Mine vote is for Pirouette, obviously

29

u/missly_ 2d ago

No Bella?... ok then....

1

u/dirtychinchilla 2d ago

Idiot dog next door is called Bella

1

u/Adolf_Titler 1d ago

I used to walk by a house often that had a little Yorkie that would run out and back when people would walk by. One time the owner came out as it ran put to bark and started yelling it's name, "Mike! Mike! Michael!!"

I thought it was hilarious.

257

u/_rose_garden_dreams_ 3d ago

No

108

u/VariousGas Sederrrdddggff 3d ago

ALEXIS GOOGLE NAMES FOR A FEMALE BITCH

36

u/XrotisseriechickenX 2d ago

My daughter says I can’t say that word anymore

21

u/phunniemee 2d ago

ALEXIS ASK JEEVES NAMES FOR A FEMALE BITCH

15

u/iamthpecial Sederrrdddggff 2d ago

Melissa,, erase ERASE delete delete delete ERASE

2

u/Gothiccheese95 2d ago

I’m the name for a female cat instead

24

u/HalfEatenChocoPants 2d ago

This really is the most appropriate response. It shows Melissa read the directions, looked through the list of names, and politely expressed her refusal to choose three names.

Of course, it would have been more polite to not respond...

228

u/hollyinnm 3d ago

Carly, Carly, Carly

65

u/zaptorque 3d ago

Pick 2 more

52

u/B1rdi 2d ago

Michael

6

u/cmyk-ree 2d ago

Karli, Quarly

18

u/iamthpecial Sederrrdddggff 2d ago

THIS WAS MY FAVRITE TWO’nnnnn!!!!!!!!!,

7

u/otheraccountisabmw 2d ago

The audacity to require people to follow their rules. It’s a Facebook post. Chill.

7

u/Neil_sm 2d ago

That’s definitely my favorite comment

5

u/ReadTwo 2d ago

Carly, Carly, Carly, Carly, Carly. I spit hot fire

145

u/9leggedfreak 3d ago

I had to put my baby Rufus down yesterdy. Amen

84

u/betherella_pink 3d ago

LOL margery uncle merv died last year so I know how you feel

31

u/intisun 2d ago

God bless 🤣🤣🤣🤣

40

u/nyan-nyan9 3d ago

RIP LOL

2

u/EmilyVS 2d ago

RIP in Peace, Rufus 😂 🌹

390

u/ladybug_oleander 3d ago

I WAS BIT BY DOG WHEN I WAS LITTLE. I WAS THE ONE WHO GOT A LICKIN BECAUSE IT WAS MY FAULT. EVERYTHIBGS DIFFERENT NOW. NOW PEOPLE WOULD NEVER SPANK A KID BUT I TELL YOU, SOME OF EM NEED IT. I SPANKED THE GRAMKIDS SOMETHIN FEIRCE TURNED EM GOOD AND TO GOD, BUT I DONT GET TO SEE THEM ANYMORE. NO ONE KNOWS WHATS GOOD FOR EM ANYMORE.

156

u/VariousGas Sederrrdddggff 3d ago

YOUR SICK. HAROLD AND I WOULD NEVER HIT THE GRAND BABBIES. WE LOVE THEM AND “SPOIL” THEM!!! GET OFF MY PAGE

130

u/MaxHasBeenGnomed 3d ago

chicken pot pie recipes

11

u/Born_Requirement_304 2d ago

r/skamteboard

9

u/youre_welcome37 2d ago

Something something corn

3

u/broken-bells 2d ago

Albert died. Are you going to the funerals?

3

u/Lucy_Koshka 2d ago

I don’t lkke cracker barel to expensive these days

2

u/MaxHasBeenGnomed 1d ago

The goolge id not workinf

96

u/amberkinn 3d ago

No Bella? Ok then...

11

u/GetMeAColdPop 2d ago

Why can't that person just, I don't know, suggest Bella? 🤷‍♀️

179

u/automaton11 3d ago

PLEASE STOP SHOWING ME THIS SPAM ASKING FOR QUESTIONS I AM NOT DOING THIS THANKS

71

u/Lol33ta "That will be ok" 3d ago

None of these names feel right.

29

u/trashconnaisseur 2d ago

You mean a dog named Lyric or Rhythm isn’t doin it for you?

61

u/dmsdmsdms1101 3d ago

ZIPLOC BAG HALF GALLON NO I TURN THIS THING OFF

18

u/brando56894 2d ago

Order corn

49

u/Voodoo_balamba 3d ago

Nancy

10

u/UmChill kentucky tiny house 2d ago

ok

52

u/michymcmouse 3d ago

Maybe pirouette?

21

u/iamthpecial Sederrrdddggff 2d ago

Dint Tell Nan y But I Dont Think She Knows How To Pronounce That i think Rhats THATS why ahe Did Not Have it As An Optikn but ☝️ I aggree

75

u/TheDollaran 3d ago

Melissa is so savage, she just outright says No

39

u/texas-hedge 3d ago

Ja’Barkus

28

u/VariousGas Sederrrdddggff 3d ago

THIS IS SO SWEET. I HAD A NEIGBOR NAMED JAMARCUS WHENNI WAS GROWING UP,, SYLVAI

38

u/quokkafarts 2d ago

Hi Nancy Greg died Tuesday doctors said it was a stoak from vaccin please call me lol

9

u/youre_welcome37 2d ago

I can't. Got to water my pot plants. The ceramic pots were a nice gift.

106

u/BombDylan 3d ago

Had a dog named Baxter when I was your age . Neighbor shot it , thought it was coyote. Hope yours does better.

67

u/BombDylan 3d ago

Anna de armas photos

26

u/JoeFelice 3d ago

Sweet that you would name you dog after my son Jete' but he doesn't like it.

26

u/jillieboobean 2d ago

idk why I'm laughing my ass off at this entire thread

22

u/balcon 3d ago

CAN I USE A CAT INSTEAD

24

u/VariousGas Sederrrdddggff 3d ago

MY CAT IS NAMED MISTER PUSSY. MISTER PUSSY IS AO FAT AND ORANGE. WE LOVE HIM,, SYLVIA

18

u/No-Slide3677 3d ago

I mean honestly they didn’t even know what kind of dog it was, so how could they make an informed decision?

15

u/calamity_machine 3d ago

BRAMLEPELT!

12

u/HalfEatenChocoPants 2d ago

Is Dawn suggesting the name Pirouette, or is she recommending that Nancy do some pirouettes in her living room to help her decide on names?

9

u/HerdingCatsAllDay 2d ago

I thought she maybe meant pivot, as in, change direction or focus and get some new ideas.

12

u/richardblack3 2d ago

Betsy's uncle passed last Sunday. Was a beautiful service. Have you met Betsy?

10

u/WolfCola4 2d ago

I do not give Facebook permission to print anything off my page xx

9

u/Worldly-Breath2158 2d ago

My nephew Nathan stocks dog foOD AT THE WALMART OH SHOOT NY COMPUTER IS BROKE AGAIN

6

u/GrizeldaGrundle 2d ago

HAVE YOU TRIED PLUGGING IT IN?! MY GRANDSON DID THAT FOR ME ONCE AND IT WORKED JUST FINE.

1

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9

u/Daerina 2d ago

PLEASE REMOVE THIS FROM MY SITE. I AM ALLERGIC TO DOGS.

6

u/WickerpigT 3d ago

Nobody suggested Doggy McDogface?

5

u/iamboobear 2d ago

Order corn

6

u/rebeccakc47 2d ago

For the love of all that is holy, please do not name it Luna or Bella

5

u/Cukimonster 2d ago

lol the amount of people who can’t, or refuse, to follow simple instructions. Then the people who comment simply to comment. People are hilarious.

6

u/GrizeldaGrundle 2d ago

WHICH MICHAEL? THAT JORDAN FELLA? OR GAY FOX? I VOTE FOR MICHAEL MCDONALD. HE IS FAMOUS. THE DOOBIE BROTHERS. MICHAEL MCDONALD SCOOBIE DOOBIE BROTHER. GREAT NAME FOR A PUP.

3

u/XrotisseriechickenX 2d ago

rotisser Iechicken

3

u/Crepes_for_days3000 2d ago

Dogs hav fleases no way

2

u/Gothiccheese95 2d ago

JESUS LOVES US FROM MARTHA

2

u/No-Maybe-1498 3d ago

ur mom should pick the name layla!!

1

u/brightshiny 2d ago

Siri. Best name ever.

1

u/mldl 2d ago

Dog.

1

u/iamthpecial Sederrrdddggff 2d ago

🧑‍🍳👌

1

u/iamthpecial Sederrrdddggff 2d ago

Siri what is the best dog name for 2019 go

1

u/mc_atx 2d ago

This shit is hilarious

1

u/owzleee 2d ago

‘Syndrome’

1

u/anothercairn 2d ago

No Bella? Ok then… 😂

1

u/SpringLover455 2d ago

i like molly

1

u/reinadeluniverso 2d ago

Phoenix

Willow

Luna

1

u/neat0burrit0_ 2d ago

Boston, molly, scout. I just wanted to give my 2c 😂

1

u/Greathorn 2d ago

No Bella?… ok then…

1

u/UnrealMitchMcConnell 2d ago

Boston for a dog’s name? Why not go all out? May I suggest: Dorchester, Mattapan, Allston

1

u/Lemondrops19 2d ago

Melissa :)))

2

u/jessicalifts 41m ago

This might be my favourite post ever on this subreddit. Living for this!