r/TheHandmaidsTale • u/KingCarterJr • 21d ago
Why Didn’t They Leave? Question
I decided to start the series all over again bcuz it’s been years since Season 1. Now I can’t help to think why didn’t June and her husband just leave as soon as they took her bank account and her job? I know it wouldn’t be a show if she had but do they ever explain this and I missed it? Then when the soldiers literally gun down protesters in the streets… I’m just so confused now. I can’t look at the show the same way.
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u/ernfio 21d ago
The basis of this decision lies in the frog in boiling water theory. The repression is insidious and they don’t see it building up to the point of threat to them.
June and Luke have relatively prosperous middle class lives. They don’t expect to be anything but privileged. They accept a bit of hardship because there is unrest int he country and the government needs to crack down on things. They assume the government even if SOJ influenced will evolve into something more progressive. They also have limited options as immigration isn’t as free and easy as people think. The point at which they could be considered asylum seekers isn’t defined in the flashbacks. So they wouldn’t have been able to emigrate and life as an undocumented refugee would have seemed worse than life in repressive state.
Many many people don’t flee in the circumstances they found themselves. They wait things out. Mainly because they don’t have a choice or the choice is unpalatable.
As to why they ignore civil unrest. The shooting of civilians in riots isn’t rare in real US history. Didn’t it happen at Kent University? There are other examples of police and civil guards attacking protesters. In the UK, many people were shot and killed in the NI troubles.
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u/beezly66 21d ago
I have so much anxiety that this is happening in real life.
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u/Effective-Being-849 21d ago
Put your anxiety to work by preventing Trump's election. Go to r/Defeat_Project_2025 or visit swing left, Indivisible, or other left-leaning groups. Even with anxiety, little money, or little time, you can have an impact by writing postcards, sending texts, or waving signs with others.
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u/beezly66 21d ago
Oh I am very politically involved, it's part of my career, but I also see the lack of response so much in daily life.
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u/sewerblunt 21d ago
me and my bf are trying to make plans in case anything happens bc of my anxieties/: it shouldn’t result to having back up plans in case something like this happens. we are not married yet but are eachothers beneficiaries for everything and as much as i don’t want to rush anything i feel like we might need to rush to get married so if anything happens we can stay together
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u/Johannablaise 21d ago
Maybe you can have a courthouse wedding and save a celebration wedding for when you want your "real" wedding.
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u/sewerblunt 21d ago
we have already decided that we would rather get married at the courthouse but still are trying not to rush it mainly because we don’t live together and with how our living situations are it’s just as easy as packing up and leaving
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u/Reasonable-843 20d ago
SAME. I am constantly worried that we’re literally the frog in boiling water right now.
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u/ancientastronaut2 21d ago
Or just look at what happened under nazi rule. I just watched a great series based off a book called we were the lucky ones.
It's about how some people were very lucky to escape and survive while most others, as we know, were certainly not. It began slow, one village at a time being taken over, people forced out of their homes and taken to camps.
The point is, most average people did not see it coming and only people who had connections and did have a bit of warning and were able to obtain fake documents made it out.
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u/LordyIHopeThereIsPie 21d ago
Otto Frank tried and failed to get his family to America from the Netherlands. They'd already fled Germany in 1933. If a country won't let you in how do you leave?
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u/Pantsonfire_6 21d ago
Yeah, just think about the people from Africa that die when they take boats that aren't safe, trying to get to European countries. Or the immigrants that show up at our southern border. Few get in.
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u/lld287 21d ago
Fantastic response. I think it can be taken a step further too— consider how much things have changed in the US in the last decade. Then consider how much it has changed in the last 25 years. It probably depends on how old you were when 9/11 happened, but as a geriatric millennial, I remember the before times clearly. That really rocked our country’s core and took away the imaginary invincibility we had.
I think the shift in the news and media digestion was already changing from the chaos of the 90s (LA riots, Oklahoma City bombing, OJ, Clinton scandal), but the energy after 9/11 pushed that to another level. Some things have changed for the better, but the things that changed for the worst are a big part of why we are in the political climate we have today.
When you consider how rapidly our democracy has devolved in the last 10 years, it becomes that much more real 1) how something like Gilead can happen in the US, and 2) how easily it happens and only becomes obvious to the masses in hindsight. In so many ways it’s a coping mechanism; people don’t want to consider it even being a possibility. It’s also everything you described, because people in economic situations like June and Luke today may not think they are privileged, but by and far Americans are significantly privileged compared to the places in the world we think would be more at risk of a Gilead scenario. People should be more concerned here, but you don’t see them fleeing en masse. At least we still have some ability to influence things through voting, but it’s like pulling teeth just to get people to do that.
And the painful truth Americans may learn is how hard it is to find the asylum our own country denies others of today
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u/KingCarterJr 21d ago
I guess once women literally can’t access their own money or work that would be a wake up call for my family that shit is real and it’s time to go until we see what’s what. But I understand what you are saying but driving to Canada is easy AF just did it last summer.
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u/stolenwallethrowaway 20d ago
Driving to Canada is easy. Let’s pretend Canada will just welcome you with open arms to stay forever. But what about all of our stuff? Selling the house? Liquidating assets? What about the cats? What about grandma in the nursing home? Do we just leave her? Shouldn’t we let little Susie finish out the year at her school? Maybe if we try a little longer to convince her, your mom will come with us. She just needs time. Are we being dramatic? This feels crazy. Let’s just wait it out a little longer and see.
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u/KingCarterJr 20d ago
I guess my thinking is different than most people’s on this thread. I’m a natural plan for the worst happening person so I’m always prepared. I don’t care about stuff… I would get my family to Canada with as much of our important things that we could fit without be suspicious. Once to safety I would work on a plan for everything else. School? Women can’t even work or have a bank account. There is no school for Susie.
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u/bjnono001 21d ago
Try driving to Canada now evidently with all of your belongings, making it clear that you have no intent to return to the U.S.
The Canadian border official will not let you in, and the political environment is nowhere nearly as bad as it was in the show.
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u/snakefinder 21d ago
In the book it was clearly stated that Luke felt the Bank situation was “ok” because he could provide for his wife and daughter.
I think they included a scene like that in the show- but they also illustrated that it was difficult to leave at SOME point (possibly around the time soldiers were gunning people down in the streets) when they show that Emily was not allowed to leave but her wife and son were allowed to go to Canada because they had Canadian passports/citizenship.
I don’t know why you would find this difficult though- it’s the classic “frog in boiling water” situation. Why didn’t Iranian women leave before the cultural revolution in the 80’s? Why didn’t all of the Jewish people leave Germany during WWII?
I’m in my 40s - and not planning on having children, so when I hear about state governments proposing travel restrictions on pregnant women I can easily dismiss it as not applying to me, but what’s next? I also live in a red state with strict abortion bans, why haven’t all of the younger women I know left the state? Why would any pregnant woman live here when she might encounter a complication but be denied medical care if it’s technically an abortion. Why haven’t they left? My state has passed laws that affect and discriminate against trans people, but I know several trans people who still live here.
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u/lld287 21d ago edited 21d ago
A handful of years ago I was working at a different company and trying to get promoted. I had two immediate options that required me to move to either Texas or Florida. I refused. My mentor at that workplace was shocked. He couldn’t understand why. I told him my concerns (thankfully we had a dynamic that allowed me to be honest) and he swore I was being overly paranoid. “That’s not gonna happen,” was the direct quote he said (more or less in reference to Roe v Wade being overturned).
I caught up with him after Roe was overturned. I made no mentions to that experience, and we have both moved on from that company. At the end of the conversation he quietly apologized for not taking me seriously.
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u/specialkk77 21d ago edited 21d ago
You were so smart. He didn’t see the writing on the wall because it wouldn’t impact him the same way it did you.
I’m a big Disney fan, at least once a week I see someone posting about wanting to relocate to Florida to be closer to the parks. I always give a list of all the reasons I chose not to move there, number one being I’m a woman of child bearing years and they won’t protect my rights in a medical emergency. I’m also bisexual and they don’t want lgbtq+ people to exist. Many other reasons but those are the biggest. I don’t know why anyone would move to Florida with the way things are right now. I hesitate to even visit, even though Disney is the safe space in that sea of crazy.
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u/beenthere7613 21d ago
I'm looking around at the women I know living in a red state. Several of them have children already, and are stuck here. You can't move a minor child out of state without the courts stepping in and giving custody to the parent who remains here. Shit, that's how I got stuck here. Then before my youngest turned 18, I already had a grandchild and our child is stuck here. We could move away, but we'd be leaving her with no support.
My sister escaped. She had to leave her daughter here, though. If something happened right now, her daughter would be stuck here.
Then there are transportation costs: people don't have a car, a car that would make it a long distance, or money to travel. They also don't have first and last month's rent plus deposit, to relocate. They don't have savings accounts to pad their move. They can't find employment without appearing in person. Sometimes it takes months to get hired, let alone to get a paycheck. All of this is prohibitive.
And of course, no one really thinks bad stuff will happen. The courts will shoot it down, etc etc.
I can see how people stick around until it's too late.
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u/Nemesis_of_Justice 21d ago
What state are you in? Courious about the pulling children from parents leaving out of state. I was wondering if a state has already gone that far or are you speaking about the ones that like to use relocation to determine placement of child in divorce/ custody issues?
We fought that battle when we moved and despite of being the one that kept SS majority of time and we relocated bc of job moving we ultimately lost bc mom fought (for the child support).
It was a f*cked up and long fight despite the fact that the mother had no desire to take care of the kid prior to us moving and she would get $800mth in cs.
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u/beenthere7613 21d ago
Child custody when one parent wants to keep the child in the state. I dont think I've ever heard of anyone successfully getting their child out without the other parent's consent. And this is normal!
That's the most frustrating part of it all, that this practice would take kids from primary caretakers, just to place them with a neglectful parent. It's counter to the "best interest" argument.
Which is why I worry when abortion laws start restricting, and attacks are already starting on the pill. I think it's safe to say the control it gives these states over women and children is concerning.
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u/lurkernomore99 21d ago edited 21d ago
Do you still live in America right now? Because women have had the right to abortion stripped. In a few states, it's illegal to travel outside of your state to get an abortion so traveling for any reason will become reason for scrutiny. They are currently writing laws to ban contraception AND no fault divorce. Books are being banned. Cop cities are formed and functional and Biden just announced he's calling for MORE. Anti trans laws are being forced out at alarming rates, and project 2025 has been published for a while now. Peaceful protesters are being killed/jailed.
We are CURRENTLY in the time where you would look back and say "why didn't they leave?"
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u/Steviesteve1234 21d ago
THIS. It’s also not just the US so where you going to go as being an immigrant somewhere only slightly better isn’t a day at the park either.
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21d ago
You’re absolutely correct. Point after point, it’s literally unfolding before our eyes. For some reason I’m deluded enough to think being lesbian will save me, yet aware enough to know that’s far from the truth. I think we know the inevitable is well under way & we find peace in lying to ourselves.
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u/Missus_Aitch_99 21d ago
Trump has announced that he plans to take away a lot of rights if he wins in November. How many of us will leave the day after Election Day? Things happen gradually, and people’s day-to-day lives don’t change much, so they just carry on until it’s too late.
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u/IndependenceLegal746 21d ago
I think people underestimate how easy it is to leave. Emily’s wife only managed to get into Canada because she was a Canadian citizen. Are other countries taking refugees? How many are they taking and what are the requirements. For me it sounds a lot like why didn’t the Jews just leave once hitler started making ridiculous laws for them? Many MANY of them tried. No one would let them in. And sometimes they had the correct paperwork only to land and not be let in because the government changed. Go look up the voyage of the damned on the St. Louis. It’s not as easy as just leaving. There has to be a country on the other side willing to let you in.
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u/Sea-Worry7956 21d ago
If you’re in the US, why aren’t you leaving now?
Our country is aiding and abetting a genocide, taking away women’s rights and Supreme Court justices are being recorded without their knowledge talking about bring America back to a godlier place. This is happening while the “nicer” party is in office. War protests were shut down by armed police and protestors arrested and that’s a constitutional right. The majority of Americans are too poor to afford a $500 surprise expense.
Anyone who’s read a history book knows where this is going. So why aren’t you leaving?
Because hey. It’s not THAT bad yet. You have your job and your family and friends and a vacation next month. You have 4th of July plans. You’re getting married in October.
That’s why they didn’t leave. Because this won’t REALLY affect us right? It’s just temporary, right? We don’t have to go anywhere yet.
Every US resident is right there with you. Frogs in boiling water, like June says.
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u/LadyStag 21d ago
I agree with people who say it's not as easy to leave as all that, but real world signs to leave aren't usually as extreme as firing all women at once. Even with Jews in Nazi Germany, the noose tightened more slowly.
I do think the part where June needs her husband's permission to get birth control is a disturbingly credible erosion of rights, on the other hand. But I do think nobody is quite terrified enough on the firing all women day.
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u/ZongduOfArrakis 21d ago
Yeah it doesn't really add up in some ways if (as is implied in the novels and books) that all women were fired and had their money transferred to a male relative's account on the same day. The fact there was still some time left with a functioning economy at all is weird as governments find it hard to cope with just like a ~5% change in employment ratios. An immediate 50% dropoff would be wild as you don't just work in those places but also rely on goods and services that are employing women.
Unless Gilead had a masterplan to immediately unveil a smooth transition to planned economy, things should have been like 1929 and 2008 combined from the massive global ripple of the world's biggest economy and home global currency peg firing half its workforce (which had to happen at some point bc almost everyone in Gilead is dirt poor).
Plus there are some plot holes like the fact that even though the bank accounts were the first thing hit, women are buying everything with tokens in Gilead and Serena once buys a prayer with actual money in the book, tho that's more a legacy of Second Wave Feminism where opening a bank account in a woman's own name was difficult but they still handled money.
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u/Pantsonfire_6 21d ago
Yes, a depression would happen easily if unemployment was that radical. Businesses would go into bankruptcy pretty quickly. The dollar would plummet and stocks would crash. Especially since some countries would cut or ban trade entirely with the U.S.
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u/ZongduOfArrakis 21d ago
Yup, 1929 just happened over overextension in the stock market, 2008 over housing. Letting all the women go in a single day would crash everything that's not a highly male-dominated industry as all workplaces would fail to do what they needed, while some more female-dominated industries like healthcare would lead to quick collapse of lucrative stuff like Big Pharma. Even without formal sanctions the balance of trade would be out of whack completely. But the show acts like June could have an okayish middle class life still with conditions just seemingly taking a nosedive after she got captured.
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u/besoinducafe 21d ago
They only qualified for immediate asylum at the borderline after the US officially became Gilead and their lives were in danger. Before then, they still needed visas and to cross legally otherwise they’d be sent back to the US-turning Gilead.
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u/Bulky-District-2757 21d ago
June says in the book a lot of stuff was supposed to be “temporary” or women just kinda said “well we can tolerate this but nothing else” then the bar kept moving.
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u/MsRebeccaApples 21d ago
Leaving is never a clear path. A lot of times when people try to leave countries that are going through revolutions leaving by any legal ways can be almost impossible.
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u/lurkernomore99 21d ago
And think about how America treats people fleeing their countries to come here. A lot of other countries are learning from American barbarian treatment of immigrants and writing laws to approve such treatment. Look at the recent election in France.
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u/Steviesteve1234 21d ago edited 21d ago
I think they couldn’t get the visa fast enough and the situation escalated quickly. I think it was so wild but also crept up on them. It’s only hindsight you woulda,coulda,shoulda when it’s too late.
Look at what happened with Emily at the airport when they interviewed her found out she had previously given birth and refused to let her leave with her family. That was when they were letting people go and it hadn’t fully turned into Gilead!
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u/Super_Reading2048 21d ago
They thought it was just temporary after the terrorist attack and then it was too late.
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u/AdelleDeWitt 21d ago
Will we be wondering this question? I've got a trans child and there's an election coming. It's hard to give up everything and move to a new place, so you don't want to do it until you know for sure you have to, but when you know for sure you have to it's too late to do it.
In almost all of Margaret Atwood's books, there is a flashback scene where there was a thing that they clearly should have done, like go to Canada or build a bunker or something. But the creepy thing is that those flashback scenes look so familiar to modern day America. That's kind of the point I think. You don't know how bad things are until it's too late.
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u/Lexei_Texas 21d ago
Everyone thinks it won’t happen to them until it does. Get your European passports now…
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u/witch51 21d ago
You'd be surprised to learn how few of us can do that. I have less that $5.00 to my name, don't drive, no friends or family, and almost 60...what do I do but suck it up and roll with it? Almost half of Americans have less than $400 in savings.
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u/Lexei_Texas 21d ago
I saved up for a year to apply. I feel like my future depends on it. Worst case scenario, flee on foot to Canada and claim asylum
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u/witch51 21d ago
Good luck with that. We all aren't all as blessed as you to be able to save it for a year. Hell, even if I could save more than $100.00 there's 1,000 things more pressing :(. You'd be so fucked if you were poor and that shit for real happened. And if you throw kids and animals on top? Impossible if you live below the poverty line. That's how and why so few flee when their countries fall apart.
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u/nowheyjose1982 21d ago
Canada won't be able to save you or anyone in the event of a Trump election win. The US military is far too powerful and Canada's population too concentrated close to the border to truly be a safe haven. Any attempt for the Canadian government to grant asylum to Americans will be viewed as a hostile action.
The only way Canada could be a safe haven for US refugees like in the show would be if a large enough portion of the military and/or a number of blue states secede, causing what's left of the US military loyal to the Trump administration to focus their resources inwards trying to quell the departures.
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u/JustMoreSadGirlShit 21d ago
lol wait do I need a different passport to travel to Europe?
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u/LordyIHopeThereIsPie 21d ago
You need a visa and if the European Union doesn't want too many Americans fleeing to here it could restrict the number and type of visas it issues.
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u/Lexei_Texas 21d ago
They could stop American passport holders from entering their countries or the American govt could stop you from leaving by cancelling everyone’s passports. If you have a passport from another country they in theory can’t stop you.
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u/Steviesteve1234 21d ago
If you have an Irish grandparent getting the European passport is quite straightforward. Just an FYI for anyone preparing for the end!
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u/Lexei_Texas 21d ago
My dad is Albanian, grandparents are born in Italy and my husband is Portuguese. We are banking on the Portuguese passport as of now.
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u/SpecialWitness4 21d ago
yeah but what's really going to stop them from keeping you in. I doubt another country is going to go to war over a couple hundred people. if something like this happened, hopefully all the Christian nationalist would continue with their "of you don't like it, leave" rhetoric so they can have what they believe is utopia
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u/Open-Face4847 21d ago
Ah yes, Europe. The place that hates immigrants and is moving to the right even faster than the US.
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u/Lexei_Texas 21d ago
I’d rather take my chances there than here if the mango sphincter is elected.
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u/Open-Face4847 21d ago
I suggest you pay more attention to European politics, then. Not to mention, the threat of Russia is far worse in Europe vs here.
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u/Micchizzle 21d ago
June wanted to leave sooner after she lost her job and access to her money and Luke didn’t. He didn’t take it seriously b/c it didn’t really effect him, he just thought he would control the situation & wanted to leave on his terms. At that point she belonged to him, he had all of the control.
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u/witch51 21d ago
Because people like them aren't very concerned with day to day struggles. They have a solidly middle class lifestyle and most people like that truly believe everything will straighten itself out. Riots in the streets? Doesn't apply to me or my life. My bank account frozen? No biggie, my husband makes enough money for both of us. Need my mans signature to get birth control? No biggie, I wanted to have a baby anyway. People like me can't afford to get to the next city over much less go to a whole other country. Once people move out of the struggle income bracket they become almost blind to society falling apart and the more money, the more blind.
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u/wordygirl6278 21d ago
The frog in the pot: put a frog in cold water and bring it up to a boil and he won’t realize he’s being cooked to death.
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u/GopiVision 21d ago
I always love when this comes up. Because it makes me force a perspective of our current border situation and the dangerous situations/governments people are "leaving" from. To us, they are migrants. For the sake of us thinking of this situation happening to us, it's us just leaving.
Everyone has explained very well why it's more complicated than just leaving, and why we'd hope we'd get compassion and space to leave TO if it happens to us in the future.
I always walk this question back with putting yourself in the equation with your current situation. Where would you go? Have you looked up thar country's visa/entry requirements. How long would you be allowed to stay? Will you only carry what you can on your back, or do you plan to fund a full move. Will you rent or buy? Are you even allowed to rent or buy if your not a citizen in the country you want to move to?
You start to do the research and realize it's not that simple and compound that with the sentiment I imagine the outside world has with the "emerging" Gilead. Will they even want you there? Are you prepared to deal with ostracism as we saw in the current season. Sometimes it's easier to stay and hope that things will change. Our issue is we always think we only have to deal with whoever for 4 years when we can't see what's happening in front of ours eyes.
May the Lord Open
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u/LordyIHopeThereIsPie 21d ago
It's hard to leave what you know. We have three kids and a house and a life here. I don't know exactly when we'd leave or how to go about it if things changed dramatically.
Our kids and my husband are dual citizens so we keep both their passports up to date because you never know. But I'm not eligible for dual citizenship and haven't gone through the necessary things to get it so would I stay? Would they leave me behind? It's hard to make a decision to become a refugee. And not all countries will want you.
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u/suffragette_citizen 21d ago
Do we have any idea from Atwood or the show writers that they would have been accepted at the border during the initial breakdown? While we know by the time they did try to escape they believed they would be able to get over the border without any documents, would that have been the case earlier?
Look at how difficult is it to emigrate from the US now if you don't have a lot of $$$$, dual citizenship or a spouse of a different nationality, and/or have a highly sought after profession. It's not as simple as just physically making it to the border.
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u/Xylophelia 21d ago
Because the US wasn’t a place bad enough to the international community for other countries to take in asylum seekers until it was fully Gilead. Plus by the time her bank account was frozen and taken—how would she buy plane tickets? Canada probably started shutting border crossings because of the influx (since that’s where she’d be driving to based on where she lived) and a lot of people have faith in systems until they’re shattered.
Many many many people, June one of them, would have this happen today and second guess their desire to exit all the way until it was too late. If this wasn’t a completely normal psychological response, every DV victim would leave during the manipulation phases before ever being hit (or at the very latest after being hit one time).
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u/kummerspect 21d ago
As a Floridian, I think about leaving all the time. This place could easily be a Gilead in a few years. But it isn’t easy to just pick up and leave, even with the resources to do so. Plus, you don’t know when it’s going to be too late. Maybe it won’t ever be. Maybe our system of checks and balances will stop it. Maybe we can change the course before it gets that bad. Plus no place is really safe. Bad things happen everywhere.
I think for a long time June was like “this is America, it won’t ever get that bad, I have rights, I have money.” But then she didn’t have money, and the constitution was suspended, and the Supreme Court was gone, and by the time they realized it was getting bad, it was too late. I think that’s a very human response. No one wants to flee their home.
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u/Christwriter 21d ago
I remember a paragraph from Misery, in which Paul Sheldon realizes one of the reasons he hasn't tried harder to get away from Annie Wilkes is the book he's writing for her, and he reflects on an interview he had with a Jewish survivor of the holocaust. He asked that exact question: Why didn't he leave?
The man's answer actually kinda haunts me: "Because I had a piano. So many of us had pianos." Or, you know. Something like that.
It haunts me a little because that was one of those childhood things. I had an upright piano as a kid. It was a beautiful instrument. One of my favorite things. And my dad, god bless him, put it in a storage unit and forgot about it. It's gone. But it still hurts, because it's not just a thing. It's all the memories attached to that thing. It's the hours spent playing at it, the practice, the dreams, the hopes...the everything. And leaving means yes, you get to live, but to do that, you have to bury those dreams and lose the touchstones for those memories. You're losing your context, if that makes sense. It's that moment of joy you feel when you see someone from your hometown. This one will understand it all. It's not easy to replace, it's not easy to move.
Now take that and multiply it by everything. Leaving means losing your friends, though you hope you'll find them again. It means losing your house (and that was one of the more devastating parts of the aftermath. Jewish families trying to return home, only to find their home and all their belongings stolen, looted, and the robbers and looters just say "Tough. I live here now.") and losing the roads you love to drive. It means losing all those little cafes you like to visit. And it means letting the bigots win. They get what they wanted. You're gone. They get your house anyway. They get most of your stuff anyway. And where are you going? To some strange place where there's no guarantee the government will treat you any better? Where you won't have any allies? Where you might not even know the language? And why? This shit happens to you every day. It's just getting a little bit worse. You can handle just a little bit worse. It will be okay. They can't possibly go that far. They can't. It's unthinkable.
And, I cannot emphasize this enough, the Jews had nowhere to go. We knew it was happening. We didn't know it was happening on that scale, but we were not stupid and there were too many people who knew for us to not know. We had recon planes flying over the camps, because survivors talked about looking up and praying for the Americans to bomb the camps, for the Russians to bomb the camps, for anybody to do something about it. Meanwhile you had the deportees across Axis-allied territories who were begging people to please, please help save people. Here's the information, here's where they are, here's everything you need to do to act...and nobody did anything. They just documented the bodies because they could use them as a club to beat the Nazis with at Nuremburg.
Or just look at the utter fucking mess down here at the Texas border. We have people begging for help with cartel violence that has its roots in US activity (We used them and trained them when they were useful, and then surprise pikachu when they don't go back in the box on our schedule) and we had legal fucking asylum seekers in fucking holding cells for most of Trump's time as President, and given that we had fucking mass graves in Falfurrias in 2013, I'm pretty sure it's still happening, but our President knows better than to boast about it.
You're talking about millions of refugee women. Millions of them pouring into Canada. Millions of them pouring into Mexico. Millions on planes to other countries, applying for asylum or going straight for the illegal route. Every single woman in America. If they left when the first signs started...fuck me, folks. We should already be leaving. And we're not. So what the fuck is our excuse? Why are we staying here?
Well, because we're all asking the same question:
Where the fuck on this planet can we go?
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u/Rightbuthumble 21d ago
Well, let this be a lesson. When white men decide the fate of women in terms of their reproductive rights, their equal rights, and constitutional rights, anything can happen...banned birth control, banned abortions, banned equal pay...you know, things that matter to women.
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u/vocalfreesia 21d ago
Why aren't people leaving the US right now? You're potentially months away from project 2025. Either people don't take it seriously, or they assume it'll be ok. But reality is, who can leave? Only the 1%
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u/dee_lio 21d ago
And go where?
With what money?
"Just leave" is great if you're wealthy, have money off shore, and a country that will accept you.
And if your money is tied up in your house, guess what happens to real estate values when the country goes to shit? Everyone panic sells, at the same time, banks won't lend, further dropping values, no one want to move to the newly minted hell hole, and values zero out.
The dollar in turn crashes, and you're flat ass broke. What country wants your broke ass?
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u/wheeler1432 20d ago
That's the part that I don't get either. She can't work and can't have a bank account and Luke's reaction is it's okay, baby, I'll take care of you? and not, wtf is this shit, let's gtfo?
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u/KingCarterJr 20d ago
Exactly I’m so confused why people think this is just a normal situation that could be brushed away! That’s a smack in the face dose of reality that stuff is getting crazy and it’s time to go. But I understand now how it happens bcuz most people on this thread would also let the same situation happen bcuz they keep giving the same examples. It’s a compliance and complacency issue. Most people just comply and follow.
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u/wheeler1432 19d ago
It really scares me. I have this conversation with a *lot* of people, and so many people are like, I can't afford it, but our whole life is here, this is where our jobs are, this is where our family is...DO YOU NOT SEE WHAT'S HAPPENING? YOU HAVE TO PROTECT YOURSELF.
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u/lizardbreath1736 21d ago
I'm rewatching season 1 currently and thinking the exact same thing. I'm wondering if the reason they didn't leave sooner was because they didn't think things would ever get that bad - like America wasn't going to cease to be America - that doesnt ever seem like a possibility to them. June says in one of the episodes something like "in a bath of water that gets hotter and hotter you be boiled alive before you knew it was too late".
Me personally would have been making a plan to nope out as soon as I legally wasn't allowed to work anymore, have a bank account ...
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u/International-Rip970 21d ago
Because Luke didn't take it seriously. Remember he told " I'll take care of you," when they were losing their jobs and rights
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u/ArseOfValhalla 21d ago
I think at that point, you dont think "oh crap i need to get out (flight response)" you think "it will get better.... right?" and I think by that point, wasn't it too late?
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u/zenitram66 21d ago
Martial law and closed borders immediately after the terrorist attack/coup is likely why they didn't leave sooner. And they were still able to go about their daily lives for a period and did not realize how bad the situation had gotten until June's bank accounts were frozen and her employment terminated. By that time, it was far too late. And the other factors listed here like low funds and lack of "proper" documentation.
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u/BonBoogies 21d ago
That opening bit made me HATE Luke for how dismissive he was of it, and the “I’ll take care of you” comment
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u/ancientastronaut2 21d ago
From what I understand this all happened slowly gradually and methodically.
By the time it got to the point you mention, it was too late, which was by design. It was near impossible. Nobody thinks this is going to happen. Plus you would have needed a plan, go bags, escape route, somewhere to go, etc. They were just average citizens that had no clue.
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u/Oomlotte99 21d ago
Leaving is hard. That’s why we see migrants risking their lives and facing all kinds of struggle trying to enter countries without documentation to do so.
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u/HappyJoie 21d ago
It's not always possible to just emigrate. Just research WWII. Most countries limited the amount of refugees they would accept. Many had no where to go.
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u/harambesBackAgain 21d ago
I think the reality truly shows here. How many of us could afford financially, physically, emotionally and spiritually to pack up and leave right now right this second? The majority here live in the United Statessl and we've been coddled so we just say "things aren't that bad.. Things can't get that bad" until it's too late.I remember when a couple banks crashed and people couldn't get their money and lost their minds imagine if that happened to the entire country...I guess Gilead is daddy now?. Seeing in Gilead how they forced women to stop working you know right then and there it's too late. How many of us know secret ways into Canada? Like legit could get in your car right now assuming you have no money or way of purchasing fuel and make it all the way there? I hope you don't live in Florida or the bottom of Texas because in that case in the great words of a random make believe Albanian in taken..."good luck." It truly just isn't feasible especially in a vehicle. eventually you're going to have to go on foot and trust random strangers. Can most of us do that? Doubt it. No when the infrastructure is set up to keep you there
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u/Janknitz 21d ago
The same reasons Jews didn't leave Europe when they had the chance. First, it happened incrementally, not all at once. They clung to the belief that it was temporary, that sanity would prevail and things would get better (that's what makes me so frightened in our country right now). When it was clear that was not the case, it was too late, impossible to leave.
Next, they built their lives where they were and they couldn't contemplate giving up everything they had ever known to go somewhere else and start over with nothing, possibly learning a foreign language, new culture, etc.
And finally, nobody wanted them. Getting visas to other countries got more and more difficult. And the few who managed to leave had the means to do so, either financially or because they had relatives in other countries, or because they had a talent or skill another country wanted. Millions did not have the means. The US--our country!--closed it's borders to European Jewish immigrants fleeing Nazis, then as we are doing to central and south American immigrants fleeing danger and economic disaster today.
In THT, there's no way that Canada could possibly absorb everyone who wanted to come into that country from the US, Mexico, Central America and South America could not either. Look what's happening at our southern borders--we are refusing to take in the refugees of those countries right now today. Americans would have been treated the same way if they tried to immigrate to our neighbors, Europe didn't want them either.
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u/2OttersInACoat 21d ago
Did you see the footage of the poor desperate Afghanis literally hanging off the planes at Kabul airport when the Taliban returned? These things can happen gradually and then very quickly once there’s a military coup. Then after government has become tyrannical they won’t allow free movement, so people can’t simply hop on a plane and leave.
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u/crazyplantlady007 21d ago
I recently started a rewatch myself!
They joked about Luke taking care of her once he had all her money. It bothered June-her mom had been warning her for years-and though she was scared, Luke kinda brushed it off like it wasn’t that big of a deal. Almost like June was being irrational but he wasn’t mean about it, hence the joke. They thought normal life would be back soon.
I think that happened right before the rally where they shot people. After that Moira left but they didn’t yet. It seemed to me that June wanted to go but Luke wanted to wait. I don’t remember the scene exactly but they are in the car and June seems pissed and says we should have left when Moira left. IIRC Luke says/yells something like I know, I know! And gets upset. (I could be missing more words in their convo, it’s just the jist.)
The whole time I think they are in shock and such disbelief and they are thinking it’s going to go back to normal and it never does. They were just waiting it out, to see if someone was gonna step in and save the day or that things won’t keep getting worse and worse.
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u/specialkk77 19d ago
I think that’s an important part for a different reason, the “we should have left when Moira did” because as we know, Moira didn’t get out. She was already too late. It just highlights how quickly Gilead took over and kept fertile women from escaping.
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u/AstarteOfCaelius 20d ago edited 20d ago
I’ve always thought that was the million dollar question about the series- but it is one that I have been asked myself: by a cop, after a particularly horrible incident with a long term abusive partner. (And so you know: this is not a question to ask survivors. You can’t ever ask it nearly as often or as intensely as we ask it ourselves.)
While I normally hate that people ask it, I love that the series begs the question in a pointed way because it’s actually a very important discussion. There are tons of great answers in your post.
One I would like to expand on is the disbelief- and manipulative people and systems play on that.
The disbelief in what you’re seeing: surely this was a one time thing. Surely that will be made right or punished, somehow. It just can’t be what it looks like. That’s where your question is, but it just keeps going through the series.
After that: You think that you are different. Maybe better than the others. That doesn’t and won’t happen to you. The series even hits the men with that one.
The entire time, in subtle ways and some not so subtle: you are being groomed to not trust yourself and your judgement. After all, this is for a greater good- and somehow, if you just do better, it’ll get better. Never does, so, because of this constant grooming: that’s clearly because of you.
Ultimately the loss of self you can watch from the jump in the series just gets worse and worse- if you rewatch, looking at it through that lens, you’ll start seeing how that disbelief at the very beginning- the part you’re asking about: gets used and made bigger until it claims people. It’s actually an incredibly powerful message.
(Edit: people are always apologizing or whatever and it’s not necessary. It’s been about 20 years and he’s dead, plus you didn’t do it. No need to say that you’re sorry.)
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u/Alohabailey_00 21d ago
Definitely boiling water theory. I feel it now in our country but helpless to do anything. How would we leave, where would we go? I have a child and 2 small dogs that I wouldn’t leave behind. As for current events are we all waiting around for Election Day. Sometime it’s also hope that things don’t go haywire or denial. Whatever you want to call it. I can see why they didn’t leave.
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u/AmitySimmer 21d ago
At that point, the President’s Day Massacre/DC Attack has happened and when they showed June and Luke hearing about it from their tv, you hear the reporter say that Marshall Law has just been declared. It’s likely that travel was extremely restricted after the massacre in dc.
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u/Idontgetredditinmd 21d ago
Ask that question again a year into the next Trump term if he wins. While Gilead was much faster than whatever that will look like, it’s the same idea. Oh the institutions will hold; this won’t last, sanity will prevail. Same things that you hear from folks who stayed in Iran after the revolution.
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u/ssradley7 21d ago
A lot of people did leave, right? I think it was Emily (Ofglen) who was scrambling along with thousands of others trying to do just that, but she was detained in the process. Some, I imagine tried to wait it out, not anticipating the severity of the movement or the closing of the borders, and others couldn’t afford to or were frozen in fear.
Damn it’s been too long since I last watched! I restarted Sharp Objects so I’m in the middle of that rn, but I’m gonna circle back to it right after. Truly the best show on television.
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u/erinusesreddit1234 21d ago
Why haven’t I left Florida yet? Because everything I know is here, and I still have ongoing obligations like school and work and we’re still living in denial — “things won’t get THAT bad” but I get more nervous every day
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u/StanyeEast 21d ago
It's hard as hell to move from the US to another country even right now...they might as well include American Idol or The Voice auditions, along with the rest of the requirements, and it wouldn't be much more difficult...some countries won't even consider you at all, unless you're like an engineer or have some other in demand skill set
Their best bet would have been to "take a vacation" somewhere and hope shit popped off while they were gone and that the country they were visiting took pity on them and wouldn't send them back
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u/bandt4ever 21d ago
Frogs in a pot of cold water. I live in the US and things are headed in a Handmaid's Tale way but am I about to move to Canada? No, for a lot of reasons. It's super expensive for one. You can't just move to another country unless you need asylum. It's better to stay and work for change in your own country.
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u/Lunathir 21d ago
Also on the show at least, she was red-tagged on the ear shortly after when she had her first daughter. In the flashbacks the crazy non-verbal at the time with short hair fled the same time June and luke did and luke finds out that nobody with a red tag was going to be let out because they were already rounding up and capturing single fertile women. Also in the scene when June stays with the ECON family before she gets caught, the guys wife is pissed and tells June that everyone who is fertile is constantly under threat of being made a handmaid for the smallest infractions and uou can see that even though she is dressed in grey, she has a red tag in her ear as well.
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u/WTFNotRealFun 21d ago
It's s valid question, but the answer is they weren't prepared.
So, the lesson here is, prepare now.
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u/ThrowRAAudrey 21d ago
Uncertainty, denial, hope things will get better, also complacency.. when your friends and family are all still there, you might not feel urgency to leave if they aren’t. It’s pack mentality. Everyone would be frozen if no one is making the extreme move to break out from the pack first. We’re pack animals at the end of the day.
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u/freakydeku 21d ago edited 21d ago
i think it was really realistic that few people left until it got much worse. I think the usage of incredible violence was the light bulb moment. People before that point were clearly scared but they still had faith in the country being able to turn around, like they went out and protested. It makes sense that no one really believed or even imagined something as insane as Gilead was truly on its way and wouldn’t be defeated
I’m sure quite a few people left but I’m not sure if I were June if I would’ve immediately after getting fired. Even if I had the means. Like, this is my home…everyone & everything I know and love is here & I think there is also a false sense of security for women like June because she had a “good guy” husband
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u/NeverEndingCoralMaze 21d ago
350,000,000 Americans; probably half of them trying or wanting to flee. It had to be such a dynamic situation.
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u/Either_Tap2827 21d ago
June says it herself early in the series " in a gradually heating bathtub you'd get boiled to death before you fully realized it's time to get out. We didn't do anything when they installed marshal law or when they cancelled Congress and now we're stuck with the end result" (not word for word obviously but along those lines).
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u/Square-Step 21d ago
They sort of explain it, but through Emily a bit better. I think the family did try to leave, but since June had already gave birth, she couldn't leave so easily. Similiar to Emily, whose wife was a Canadian citizen and they were trying to get out before Gilaed took over, but she couldn't leave because she had the ability to give birth
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u/raincloudparade 21d ago
Where would they have gone? The border was likely secured. They had a small child and one income. Their finances and life were tied to their current living arrangement. It’s not as simple as “pack a bag and go.” We’re watching with the gift of hindsight. The characters didn’t know it would keep getting worse. And there wasn’t really a destination to “escape” to. On top of that, Trying to get established in another country is super complicated.
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u/RphWrites 21d ago
I'm American, my husband is British and our kids are dual citizens. (He's a permanent resident but not a citizen.) This show encouraged us to get our kids their British passports and paperwork filed.
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u/lordmwahaha 21d ago
First of all because they were scared to do anything in case they got shot. Second, Luke does mention they were waiting for a visa process - because you know, you can’t actually just leave the country whenever you want and however you want, that’s called illegal immigration, and many countries (like the US) treat people terribly for doing that. You have to make sure you’re travelling legally or the other country is just gonna send you back (until it reaches a certain point where Canada officially opens their doors, which I assume hadn’t happened yet).
Which I believe is part of the point - they get screwed by the same laws the US uses to hurt people from other countries who are also just trying to escape oppression. Because they had to wait for a “legal” means of leaving the country, they wait too long and ultimately don’t make it.
Also it is worth noting that Moira left far earlier and she also got caught.
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u/KierkeKRAMER 21d ago
I was rewatching with my partner and I told her I was taking her and her mom to Canada as soon as the bank stuff went down. Then after they were safe, I’d turn around and head back to join the rebels
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u/KingCarterJr 20d ago
That’s my thought. The bank and the job stuff was a legit slap in the face that shit was real. Getting to Canada with only our most important stuff not to look suspicious at the border would be my first thought.
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u/Open-Face4847 21d ago
You’ve already gotten the most direct answer, which is the frog in the boiling pot theory. They wouldn’t have noticed how bad it was until it was too late.
I agree with that theory but I also think this is a spot where the show struggles with realism. When the book was written, there was no internet or cell phones. It would have been much easier to carry on with your day to day because we weren’t all connected.
With the series taking place in a more technological era, it’s harder to believe that the government would have succeeded without serious pushback early on.
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u/LinwoodKei 21d ago
It's the same argument that you can make for domestic violence victims. Leaving would mean departing from friends, a job and shelter. They would have to move to a different area and hope that there was a job and an apartment.
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u/Far_Importance_6235 21d ago
I would have left as soon as I lost my job for being a women. I understand Luke wanting to wait for visa’s. But when armed men patrol the streets I’d pack up and go.
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u/ToxicFluffer 21d ago
I think that’s the point. Movements like this build over time and it exposes how much you’re willing to tolerate before you realise something is deeply wrong.
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u/LordyIHopeThereIsPie 21d ago
Op if you haven't read the book Prophet Song I'd highly recommend it. It's really stayed with me in terms of when you go and when it's too late to go but should you go anyway.
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u/Octavia8880 21d ago edited 21d ago
People were in denial, a good example is a scene where people are protesting and these guard start shooting there is a man with long hair and glasses staring in utter disbelief, such a small scene but to me says alot, people refused to see what was going to happen, l do wonder why June's mother didn't see what was happening, Holly should've warned them to get out, she was an activist, would've kept track of what was happening, yet she didn't
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u/imperfectchicken 21d ago
Remember all those celebrities that said they would leave if Trump was elected president?
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u/lysistrata3000 21d ago
Why didn't they leave? They had a kid. June had already proven she could produce children. She would have been on a watch list. The borders were closed, and look how difficult was when they made their failed escape attempt!
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u/NopePeaceOut2323 21d ago
I think all of it must have happened quickly the Gilead leaders had this planned out for years so by the time people were leaving they already had implemented the border lock down.
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u/selinakylie 21d ago
I’m showing my partner the show for the first time and I had to say to them “the moment they make men sign for a woman’s birth control, we are leaving.” People often don’t see the signs as they’re happening. We’re too close to see the big picture. People often ignore the signs if they aren’t directly affected by it. Some people are privileged enough (like Serena) that they don’t realize they should’ve got out until they’re already in too deep to leave. Many would argue that America is in the early stages of the America in this show. But we are still here. It’s complicated.
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u/autumnlover1515 20d ago
I think its normal to think of this first. Even June herself said they waited too long. Maybe, just speculating here, when something THAT crazy starts happening… People probably think, nah this isnt going to continue. Theres no way the military and the gov are just gonna let this happen. There is anger but there could also be denial, which could make people hesitate to take immediate action.
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u/ClassAcrobatic1800 20d ago
They don't want to leave their home country ... and they think that they can adapt to the changes ... or that they will be temporary.
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u/Volume904 20d ago
Think about Hitler and the Jews. Everyone thinks it won’t get that bad or they wait until the last minute as they don’t want to disrupt their lives any more than they have too, plus it all costs money.
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u/EvilWitchy 20d ago
Not to turn this into a political post but, have you seen the news and people's comments made about the immigrants around the world? When someone is migrating from a distressed country stones are thrown, no matter how well off the country was doing before, even worse if it was not a first world country. There is a short period of time that citizens believe that everything will be somehow resolved or corrected, then, they realize; sadly too late sometimes that will not. Once the migration starts, the migrants are treated as a problem that hopefully someone else will resolve or deal with. I think in this case the producers portraited perfectly the different scenarios that happen, all at once, in the short span of a political change and a humanitarian crisis.
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u/DeathKillsLove 20d ago
The Frog Soup effect.
Tell people they need to flee but they aren't going to die today and they sit passively while you get the trains running to Poland.
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u/Express_Front9593 20d ago
Everything everyone else said plus people tend to minimize bad situations that they can't escape-it's never that bad until they are personally exposed, and even then some/most will usually find a way to explain it away and cope.
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u/KiwiSecret 19d ago
They did try to leave. Do you mean leave earlier? June says this over and over in the show. Everyone had multiple signs but they closed their eyes to them and hoped for the best. It's just like the political climate now.
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u/eloquentpetrichor 19d ago
We also see this a bit when we see Emily and her wife trying to leave the counrty. Idk how quickly they tried but I feel like it was faster than June and Luke did and the airports were a mess and already not letting fertile US citizens leave
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u/WomensMaydayGroup 19d ago
Please join my community and spread the word! I am trying to organize safe groups for each state (OH) here and how to start stocking up on resources for cheap and educate others on Project 2025 before it is too late. more info on my page. I am begging you please spread the word and join the community please share
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u/KeyOdd9101 18d ago
For the same reasons when war was starting in 1930s Germany, people still refused to believe it. People refuse to believe what is happening right before their own eyes...Eternal optimism that things will resolve themselves and steadfast denial that mankind can be so cruel.
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u/Affectionate-Ad8573 17d ago
i feel like luke was dragging his feet ALOT and waiting bc everything that was happening in the beginning didn’t affect him directly only women. but then they started rounding people up and that’s when the urgency came to him. in the last season june left immediately instead of waiting with luke like last time.
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u/hikehikebaby 17d ago
I think this is pretty much the same as asking why the Jews didn't leave Germany and the answer is some people did, some people tried and failed, and some people waited too late to try. You can see that in my family too. My great-grandparents left Europe before Hitler was even elected. Many of their relatives thought that things were going to be okay and just to stay and wait it out. They were killed.
You have to remember that we're talking about an ethnic minority that had been persecuted for centuries so people had good reason to feel that this was nothing new and nothing different from what they had experienced in the past. Women have been dealing with progressive politics in the United States for a really long time so I can imagine guy many women would think that it wouldn't get that bad. There's been a time in recent memory where women couldn't have their own bank accounts. Gilead was totally new and unexpected.
I'm sure lots of people did leave America before Gilead rose to power, but we're hearing the stories of people who didn't. There are always people who leave and people who don't.
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u/trashpandac0llective 17d ago
Margaret Atwood made a point to only write events that have already happened in real world history. We see people in escalating danger who won’t/can’t/don’t think they should leave the country all the time, throughout recent history.
Hell, I live in Texas, where we have all kinds of liberties being stripped from us, complete with judicial, police, and military enforcement. (I’ve personally been threatened by a state trooper on the steps of the Capitol while protesting peacefully when our government started forcibly removing trans children from their families.)
People on the internet routinely wonder aloud why Texans don’t just leave. Some of us do…many more (myself included) can’t. 🤷🏻♀️
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u/Grantasma 21d ago
It costs money to leave and they'd have to find a place that would accept them. It would mean finding housing, a job, etc and filing for a visa--which the US might have already been working to block. And they probably figured it couldn't possibly continue--people are thinking that now and look what's happening here.